Clare

Y'all I hid all my drugs from the house cleaner (I know, I'm high Lucille Bluth) & I forgot where. I truly am a walking bad sitcom plot.

For real, she was ecstatic, 😂 the bird considerably less so.

It's technically the UK, but yes. But I took an oath to this country & I'll fight as long as I possibly can.

It blows my gd mind that I may die for proper democracy 4,500 miles & 40 years away from where I was born into occupation.

Apparently I have a fate. 😬

I opened the door & a fricking bird flew straight over my head & into the house.

Lily had him in her jaws in my living room upstairs, idk HOW bff managed to get it out of her mouth but she did, we took him outside & I assumed he was like, very dead but he just FLEW AWAY.

Pretty big day for Lily.

My babushka. 🖤

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Oh yeah, I'm out for animals, thank you for saving me from that.

Back to Resident Alien, where most of the "bad guys" are hilarious.

Not my pic but we've had a couple of Carolina Wrens show up this year & omg do they have a glorious little song! He stares at us through the living room windows if there's not enough seed for his liking & I love him. I love all the birds here, you really get to "know" them.

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Idk how, but I swear you can smell a good book! Have fun & tysm for helping the library; libraries & a mobile book van along with their librarians absolutely saved my life.

It's next on my list & I'm legit scared to watch it. 😳

There were loud construction sounds outside, so Butters (bff's elderly boy) came upstairs to get away from that. The eyes! 👀.

if the national guard and ICE goons ever get deployed to Pittsburgh, i think we should all dress up like Mister Rogers in cardigans and Keds, or characters from his show.

imagine the optics of cowardly bullies pointing rifles at people cosplaying the kindest person & characters in history

🚨 INTERSPECIES FRIENDSHIP UPDATE 🚨 Lily Belle loves Xena & wants to snuggle so much.

Lily is a nursery kitty, she's been following me around since Josey passed. One critical difference: Lily also has a gloriously floofy belly but you are NOT allowed to touch it.

Not that she flaunts it or anything.

Of course!

I've never seen a dogwood do this so we discovered that it's a Kousa dogwood, native to east asia. Apparently the fruit is edible and has a mild, sweet taste, though it is often left for birds to eat (which we'll do). They're just such pretty little berries.

Bff's ex (who is terrified of me) sent her a text that confirms what I assumed was true: he drives by her house regularly. Then he used that (a box on the porch) to starting sending bff weird little texts. & I realized bc I'd JUST explained it to her: this 65 year old bully dipshit is a fuck boi!

Butters fell asleep hugging his ducky. 🥹

Hello my name is Clare & I'd pay a zillion dollars to sleep through the night.

Lily by candlelight.

Clearly! Bappety bap! 🐾

Omg kitty is quite the boxer! They are too cute together!

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Could be any one of a zillion things but my tummy hurts so badly, I literally cannot stand up. Which would be fine except excessive laying about makes me sad. Thank god for good TV, I can't even read.

Xena prays that someone will throw her toy. Bc no one EVER plays with her. 😢

The insomnia is a life long thing, I've seen SO many doctors about it. It's not usually *this* bad, I can usually get at least a couple hours at a time. I used to do hard exercise for this but I can't anymore.

Also I'm so sorry you can relate, it SUCKS so hard!

My nightly cocktail is: 300 mgs seroquel, 20 mgs Valium, & all the weed I can cram into my poor body. Weed allowed me to get of massive amounts of narcotics, i hope someday just weed alone will be enough.

Also I like to high shop & then I'm surprised when whatever arrives, that's fun!

Nothing helps me sleep, I've had "intractable insomnia" forever & am **heavily** sedated when i sleep, I usually get about 2 hours at a time, I get up maybe 6-20 times a night. But turns out that was luxury & it can get worse! 🤦‍♀️

My legs are getting so weak, soon I won't be able to walk at all w/o assistance. It's fucking terrifying & I'm so tired (haven't slept AT ALL for 48+ hours), I keep bursting into tears. I never cry, I honestly can't remember the last time. I'm just bloody tired of it. I just want to walk. 😭

Oh god I'm out of zofran. Tomorrow's professors are about to find out I am not playing about the brain tumor. 🤮

I feel guilty for being so dejected. I have so much, & so many are going through much worse. But i still feel hella...sad I guess. Idk I'm not good at emotions.