I’d like a scenario where I’m Kirby and I inhale puffer coat snoopy

Some of you have never learned mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell and it shows.

my little demon

puffy pasta party

The limit does not exist

you’re telling me people are getting paid to protest and I’ve just been hating Trump for free?!?!!

Update: Democratic House Speaker Emerita Melissa Hortman and her husband Mark have died after they were shot at their home in Brooklyn Park.

not sure there's a more embarrassing profession than ICE agent. Oh, you dress like a soldier to abduct sous chefs and throw flashbangs at protesters? Get a real job you loser

‘Big Tits Potato Chips’ - 1930s - made in Dunn, North Carolina. ‘Big Tits was the nickname of Titus Tart, one of the owners in the Tart-Chestnut Co. The image is that of Mr. Tart.’

In my experience, if something feels off, that’s because it is

my villain origin is just my ibs

less ai, more men in therapy

new city, new car, good shows, great birthday

Happy birthday to @itsdiane.bsky.social!!

My mental state is currently at the ready to rewatch succession again stage

I wanted this salad spinner that was $30 on Amazon - which is insane - so I never bought it, and I found the same exact one, brand new, for $4 at a thrift store.
Ultimately not important but everything you want is at the thrift store.

I’ve never even heard of Kenny Rogers Roasters

Am I wrong?

I’m tired of Trump voters existing

Turns out Le Pen is not mightier than the fraud.

Clearly no one in this chat has ever had someone screenshot their snap

After the Atlantic published the texts this morning, Tulsi Gabbard is confronted today on why she lied in her testimony to the Senate yesterday. She says she misremembered.

“We are currently clean on OPSEC” accidentally sent to a journalist is an all time classic.

Still from a video game. I don't remember the title. it's something where you roleplay as a man falling in love with a giant fish? Or something? Anyway, this is a drawing of a giant goldfish laying on top of a shirtless, bearded man. The text says "Glub glub, he whispers."

they added me to the group chat and all i sent was this

new place to boo just dropped

The Trump Administration Accidentally Texted Me Its War Plans U.S. national-security leaders included me in a group chat about upcoming military strikes in Yemen. I didn’t think it could be real. Then the bombs started falling.

In 25 years of covering national security, I’ve never seen a story like this: Senior Trump officials discussed planning for the U.S. attack on Yemen in a Signal group--and inadvertently added the editor-in-chief of The Atlantic. www.theatlantic.com/politics/arc...

I mean this wholeheartedly and in the best way- Minneapolis bus drivers have big dick energy

my sons

Really missing Boston Rob right now.

Mice got into our food and destroyed our entire pantry and not a single one of them taught me how to cook