Sarah Lind

This is a wordplay, I do not actually care for peanut butter

Peanut butter is my jam

Happy new year, cretins.

I love that almond milk eggnog exists like the weird part of eggnog is the milk and not the shelled mucus

Please go easy on customer service/retail workers always and especially during the stink-o holidays. Please. I’m begging.

Just like Beyoncé, my ass is getting bigger.
Unlike Beyoncé, my cash is not getting larger.

I need to stop referencing Jack Palance so much

Lars Ulrich has big Paul McCartney energy

Sort-of watching a whole movie by ambiently catching all the main scenes on tv over a five year period is a lost art

Someone just gave me Crispin Glover’s phone number. It was not Crispin Glover.

OF COURSE I have a favourite time

Me laughing loudly at a cafe table. I look cute and hysterical. There is a child looking at me in the background.

Close up of the child looking at me with what looks like shock and wonder in her mom’s arms.

I usually laugh pretty loud and my friend told me one of the funniest stories I’ve ever heard and then she took a picture of me laughing very loudly. She also captured this little nugget’s reaction.

I love her so much!

My cat starts purring when she sees me pet other animals.

When you’re durnk: ha ha I’m drunk

It’s only 8am and I’ve said “though” way too many times already

I honestly think Hank Azaria is the announcer on LA trains

Lol Ali

Beanie

Koreatown is brutal

Finally

All-time favourite

I keep thinking the poster says Girl of Destiny

Life ends but it doesn’t quit right guys