@bonechocolates.bsky.social
Autistic investigative journalist in training. I agree w/Buddhists who love Christ but find Christians so strangely un-Christ-like. I don't like seeing people lied to.
Ever hear Tom Waits' "Martha" (no one I've met didn't love) when he calls girl FORTY yrs later (& u 100% know he did) it's stunning.
Learned "Meat Loaf" (dumb name) large but sexy singer who was just UNDENIABLE, covered it.
Well it feels like actual opiates in my body...
youtu.be/Dj7HRf6erFE?...
Ever hear Tom Waits' "Martha" (no one I've met didn't love) when he calls girl FORTY yrs later (& u 100% know he did) it's stunning.
Learned "Meat Loaf" (dumb name) large but sexy singer who was just UNDENIABLE, covered it.
Well it feels like actual opiates in my body...
youtu.be/Dj7HRf6erFE?...
You guys...
You can refer to Rob Lowe as "Raw Blow" right to his face, and he won't even know.
You can call the Dalai Lama "his holiness the Dolly Llama," and no one can stop you.
NO ONE!!
"I hope someone breaks both my legs" is an actual thought I just had, verbatim, fully articulated, seemingly out of nowhere.
Wtf brain
Truth 😆
15.02.2026 19:17 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0And the source of the admiration is always important!
Someone on Twitter (I still call it that out of spite and login almost exclusively to bully Musk) posted screenshot of being blocked by him.
It was fake but OMG I would have been beaming in delight for a literal calendar year.
"Tragedy is when I stub my toe.
Comedy is when you fall into a well and die."
-Mel Brooks (paraphrased, i don't recall exact wording)
Oh god yeah this old thing
15.02.2026 08:30 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Why is it so sexy to be an "international jewel thief"?
If I rummage in someone's drawers to find their grandma's necklace, that makes me an asshole, but if I use the money to buy a plane ticket home, all of a sudden I'm a suave James Bond type?
lol I think something about the word "heist" makes it mysterious and thriller-adjacent
15.02.2026 08:30 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Oh yeah there's that expression. I don't think that was in my unconscious when that thought floated to the surface though.
I think it was more like I want the mafia to kill me, lol. I'm not joking...
"I hope someone breaks both my legs" is an actual thought I just had, verbatim, fully articulated, seemingly out of nowhere.
Wtf brain
Someone called me a "fckn scumbag" on reddit last night.
So I'll be riding that high all week.
LMAO
15.02.2026 08:13 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0I hope all 3,500 of you didn't like my last joke because you're literally dead.
15.02.2026 08:11 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Lately when I write a post I really like it's a fairly reliable indicator that other people will not think it's as amusing as I do.
15.02.2026 08:07 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Bearrister
A bear who is a lawyer
You guys...
You can refer to Rob Lowe as "Raw Blow" right to his face, and he won't even know.
You can call the Dalai Lama "his holiness the Dolly Llama," and no one can stop you.
NO ONE!!
I'm assuming that's a video game correct?
13.02.2026 16:50 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Say something nice about someone today:
@bonechocolates.bsky.social you have a distinct view of the world and it's absolutly hilarious. I expect more people to appreacite your comedy genius!
This is so freaking sweet!
I'm not for everyone and I like it that way so I appreciate people who "get me" even more so.
Thank you so much Patrick, you made my week! 😸🫶
Just "Winning Friends and Influencing People," like I am so wont to do.
26.11.2025 10:58 — 👍 8 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
I saw my soulmate drive by me in a car today. I know that we could never be together in this lifetime, Armando, but in another life, when we are the same species, find me, my love.
11.02.2026 02:40 — 👍 12 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0LMAO this sentence! It's fucking beautiful 🤣
11.02.2026 03:28 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
I saw my soulmate drive by me in a car today. I know that we could never be together in this lifetime, Armando, but in another life, when we are the same species, find me, my love.
11.02.2026 02:40 — 👍 12 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0The reality is that in we exist in cosmic time with lifetimes so brief they aren’t so much an infinitesimal, minuscule speck but essentially never even happened.
But pretend with me like any of this matters.
For a long time i thought the saying was "existence is futile" and honestly that still makes more sense to me
09.01.2026 04:21 — 👍 18 🔁 5 💬 1 📌 0I wanna go on Wheel of Fortune just to shout "No whammy, no whammy. Big money...big money. Annnnd STOP!
I said STOP!! Why won't it stop?!"
and be kicked off
Let me explain football:
U need to get ball as far to other side as you can. But other guys wanna stop you!
And there's a guy called a quarterback, & somehow he's the most important guy to throw the ball (?)
And sometimes something special happens & they get to kick the ball into this giant fork.
lol I'm glad you like this one!! I know it's not for most people!
09.02.2026 05:32 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
