Kevin

I think if any jurisdiction follows strict matrilineal descent, it's Marmalade. So at best, her husband would be Lord Consort. A Prince Philip situation, basically.

If you rank govts by how many Christians they killed, top of list are self-identified Christian countries killing those they view as the wrong kind of Christian.

For the low, low price of tolerating the mere existence of atheists, you will never be burned at the stake for heresy.

Take the deal.

One day people will remember that separation of church and state protects the church probably more than the state. These bozos never realize that if church and state are the same entity then whoever becomes head of state is head of your church and if you don't like it, surprise you're a heretic.

AND Rick Moranis' pouty little lower lip on screen the whole time made me want to do things to him.

Little Shop of Horrors. The Davis in Chicago did a screening for Halloween. It is literally a perfect film. Not a single wasted frame. A spectacular adaptation of the source material. And 90 minutes of Ellen Greene gently breaking your heart in a billion tiny pieces and making you love her for it.

I live in hope of the day we abandon our puritanical conflating of financial success and moral value so we can really start tackling some problems, but if we actually did that, we'd probably already have solved those problems in the process.

See also people getting annoyed when a lot of nonprofit donations go to 'overhead' (read:staff salaries). Particularly if that nonprofit is doing a bunch of direct services, it should go to staff salaries. That's how you attract and retain talented people to do really hard work.

This is the apex of a whole class of policies that feel good but do bad. It makes intuitive sense to cut salaries because you feel Congress isn't doing a good job, but most people don't connect the dots that if being a congressman pays nothing, it's only open to people with vast inherited wealth.

But just in case you traveled through time, you have so much to warn the people of 2015 about...

It’s kinda dumb that there’s a character named Sauron and one named Saruman. That’s like having your two main villains named Becca and Rebecca.

And the morning and evening routines get longer and less negotiable. "I can grab a donut at the office or not whatever I'm fine" becomes "I need protein in the morning or I feel like crap all day" or the moment you realize your pill dispenser will never again have fewer pills than it does right now.

I find it manifests as "I remain generally fine but more work is required to maintain it." I used to be able to function on three hours of sleep on a concrete floor. Now, if I don't have my special pillow, I'm taking a sick day tomorrow because I won't be able to turn my neck.

I mean, come on, picture him in that thing smiling. The ad writes itself.

Now, the only fault I can pin on his campaign is there's no ad of him riding a giant apple to work.

from people magazine Donald Trump Confuses Dementia Screening for 'Very Hard' IQ Test as He Brags About Results The president predicted that Democratic Reps. Jasmine Crockett and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez could not perform as well as he did in a cognitive exam By Greta Bjornson | Updated on October 28, 2025 10:24AM EDT

from people magazine Donald Trump Hosts Great Gatsby-Themed Halloween Party as 42 Million Americans Brace for SNAP Benefits to Expire The president hosted the Roaring '20s bash at Mar-a-Lago on Oct. 31 amid the ongoing government shutdown By Bailey Richards Published on November 1, 2025 06:19PM EDT

someone invited people magazine to the kitchen and they brought their own knives

It’s basically Deep Space Nine.

the party now cared more about climate change and various academic fixations than cheap energy and good-paying jobs.

This right here, this exact sentence, is THE problem in American political journalism.

The IRA *was* cheap energy and good jobs! That was the whole bill! Democrats did precisely what political pundits are telling them to do and the pundits just ignore it.

I never thought hearing a random old man call someone a prick a bunch of times would move me to tears but hear we are.

Venting about something mildly annoying is occasionally more pleasurable than not being annoyed. I think it's a psychological salve. If the small thing is what I'm complaining about, things must be okay generally.

More importantly, it also took Agnes Moorehead from us too soon. RIP Endora.

I initially read that as "cheering for US bobsled IS harder now" and my stomach dropped wondering what Flavor Flav did and I was so sad. Phew.

It's A'delle D'Zeem, you petaQ.

A ★★★★★ review of If I Had Legs I'd Kick You (2025) So obviously the centerpiece of this movie is a career-defining performance from Rose Byrne. The whole movie is basically a close up of her face and she carries the whole thing. She does an incredible...

I'm still a little anxious after watching this and I will be thinking about it for a while.

letterboxd.com/foofyattorne...

I can't decide if I should be encouraged that this is their best shot at an October surprise or worried that it might stick because you never go broke betting on stupid. It's the former, right? Right?! RIGHT?!?!

But also, good lord these men exhaust me. Star Trek, particularly from the 90s is jokingly but 100% accurately described as Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Communism. What show were these twerps watching?? "I'm mad that the show that championed an interracial kiss went woke," is just so, so dumb.

I think I finally squared the circle of the men mad at Star Trek for "going woke." Conservatives' greatest gripe is never being praised by mainstream culture, so liking Star Trek, which even while popular is still niche, let them feel like they were at least outsiders who liked a cool thing.

A man in bed looks passively at a Beholder (D&D monster) hovering before him. Text: “Do not be afraid, Kevin. I am God, assuming a form your human mind will find most comforting. I—wait, hold on, what am I right now? Normally I'm like, a grandma or a talking dog or something. Wow, Kevin, you must be super messed up.”

I learned that Broadway employs more people than the coal industry and I've never been the same. I wait eternally for the Atlantic to do a soft focus piece on 30-somethings in the Village with an ill-advised MFA.

The Trump tower in Chicago is actually a pretty good building architecturally, it's just ruined by having his name on it. I've decided not only do I want Trump's name removed, I want Obama's put in its place, because that will hurt more.

But yes, full damnatio memoriae for all them.

The snort I just let out in a public place...