Celah Convis

i never got the “daddy” type of kink shit until i realized: i’m the daddy

i have got to start eating like i want my body to last longer than tomorrow

friend group in da karaoke bar asked for my number i declined and gave em my instagram bc “im emotionally unavailable but nice to look at” drunk me kinda dropping bars

continually disappointing myself with my readiness to believe things have changed

hindsight or something

way too close to accepting a date i don’t actually wanna go on just bc i want to go out to eat. never check your dms when hungry

i want to have a friendship where someone is genuinely interested and excited to listen to my music and share theirs with me. but i have only experienced that connection in interactions where the other person wanted to fuck me. so is this a real thing that can exist separate from that.

feeling like i’m currently in a season of overflowing, not with bounty, but something messy and ill-contained, oil spills warranting apology, nowhere proper to dispose of my heart’s excess

FUCK my therapist’s timeline i’m ready to get married!!!!

the way both the opener and the headliner of the sexy lesbian rock show flirted with me during their sets and i still wake up thinking No One Will Ever Want Me like girl get some ketamine and emdr

i think i’m getting pretty good at watering this hollow wood

maybe i make being vulnerable more of a big deal than it has to be but so far every vulnerability i’ve expressed has been disregarded and exploited at one point by the people i trusted most

how i want to share music with someone in a meaningful way that i wont come to regret

maybe i should never travel again because the two trips i get this year were and will be bookended by the same person leaving me in different ways

my god let me just catch a fucking break

the day i start believing im worthy of the love i give it’s over for you bitches!

how long is it gonna take to get to the part of my career when i’m established enough to start looking like a boy

how about we take this back to my place and establish a dynamic that will confuse our community for decades to come

i went to the worthy of love city and everyone knew you? i was banished upon sight however

jewels sparkles is just a disguise jorgeous puts on when she doesn’t want rupaul to try to fuck her

and for my next trick i will attract someone emotionally available who wants to take care of me

i need to date and dump more people because i know i would body the role of “girl you never get over” so well. i know someone stalking me bc i was in their partner’s past would be throwing up on the reg

eating a medically concerning amount of grapes

anyone wanna scratch my back until i fall asleep? no worries if not

you are literally leaving me on read rn

i swear ppl can smell that i’m emotionally unavailable at the moment bc why am i getting the most dm date requests i’ve ever had

one day no cry please

genuinely feel sick to my stomach when a pretty girl doesn’t think she’s pretty

there’s a new trend going around i think we should all try it it’s called not fucking with my heart

the pride, the unguarded affection, the unashamed association. i would rather be loved like a best friend over anything else