manic pixie nightmare goblin™️

my partner watched avengers endgame yesterday. it came out in 2019. what struck me was that you wouldn’t be able to make that film now. a heroic billionaire? anything possible with one snap of the fingers and you don’t fix climate change or fascism everyone’s starting to see through it.

thinking about the time i met a blind pomeranian called chris who never bumped into things unless he went out for a walk on bin collection day 😭

my new year’s resolutions are:
-journal more consistently
-scrutinise bad stories about women in media more critically
-try all the pasta shapes
-offend ALL conservatives with my existence

people who say lying is bad have clearly never met someone who doesn’t lie. one of my partners once told me i looked like frodo with my haircut. he also said he could “tell i was unsure of myself” when i proudly showed him a video of me doing (nailing, actually) a move I’d learned in a class

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME
I EXPRESSED MY FEELINGS
AND I SET A BOUNDARY

Statistically everyone knows a woman who's been raped (1 in 4). But the flip side of that coin is that everyone therefore also knows a rapist. And that's a much harder pill to swallow.

The man that groomed me when i was 16 wasn't some cartoonish supervillain, he was beloved in the community. He had a wife and three kids. More often than not it’s IMPOSSIBLE to tell if someone’s safe to be around.

One thing i’ve noticed RE the Pelicot trial is people talking about how normal all the perpetrators were. Just ordinary men. I doubt i'm the only woman to be completely unsurprised by this.

Give her what she really wants this holiday season. Death to the patriarchy, bodily autonomy, and real pockets in every dress and pair of pants.

but don’t worry! our own internal research which we have refused to release to any staff says that you are all more productive when working under strip lighting with constant of auditory distraction!

welcome to the [redacted] office, which we’ll be forcing you to come into 3 days a week from Jan for…reasons. you get the cheapest possible instant coffee, 4 microwaves for the whole 11-storey building, no food prep equipment, and the sound of everyone’s teams notifications pinging every 30 seconds.

totally agree - i’ve started being more open about it and have found overall everyone has been kind and understanding.

yeah. SAD and the fatigue that comes with it are kicking my butt. brain fog is so bad im just clinging on at work. so sorry you’re going through the shitter too.

i wish to live in one of those little mouse holes you see in the skirting boards in cartoons. no rent. mouse friends. a mini babybel which would be a giant wheel of cheese you could all share

one of the things about myself i’m most proud of is that i loathed elon musk way, WAY before everyone else did. i have been nursing a simmering hatred of that man since 2013. more than a decade. one third of my life. i got weird incel vibes back before the word incel even entered the lexicon.

this gorgeous drawing came up on my insta feed today after weeks of the app shoving weight loss content at me. she’s so pretty and she looks kind of like me! i’ve been in a body dysmorphia hate spiral for weeks now but she’s making me feel a little better today. artist is spit_blossoms 🧚‍♀️

my favourite thing on the internet the last couple days is leftists saying luigi mangione has been “milkshake ducked” cos he made some anti-woke tweets. oh im sorry is our fave LITERAL MURDERER not morally pure enough for you? lmao

do we think luigi blew his back out for being too great at sex? like he’s such a generous lover that he refused to stop even though he was in pain because he cares about his partners pleasure so much? just going and going and going?

ME FROM 9 PM TO MIDNIGHT: I am exhausted

ME AT 1 AM: Need to research how to do trapeze

a woman in a pink dress is laying on a bed in a room ALT: a woman in a pink dress is laying on a bed in a room

at this point in the film my boyfriend just turned to me and gave me the most long-suffering look

i dragged myself into the office yesterday in a fucking storm and what do i get for my bravery? instant coffee and a guy trying to get me to sign up to crossfit. ME. CROSSFIT.

help, i liked wicked but i didn’t LOVE wicked and now i feel like a bad gay

there’s such a lovely feeling of solidarity and understanding. i’ve never been to an event before where i don’t feel like i have to mask. it’s so meaningful.

i’m at a conference for women with ADHD. about 30 people came in late - no shaming whatsoever. one woman’s brought her knitting. overhead one woman said “i want to track how many piles of stuff i have everywhere depending on where i am in my cycle”.

Did you know? Black Friday is named in honor of Rebecca Black, who invented Friday in 2011.

floaf

my therapist HATES my mother. to the point where she’s told me she thinks about how awful my mother is even outside of work hours. and honestly there is no form of validation more delicious than that

today on the polyamory docket: coaching a partner through relationship woes WHILE missing a long distance partner WHILE working through de-escalation with someone else WHILE also being really excited cos someone you fancy asked you out. people say “wow i could never” and like year fair enough tbh

gladiator 2 was bad for many reasons but the worst is how much we were queer-baited by paul mescal in those tiny little shorts and there wasn't even a molecule of gayness in the film. it was ROME. if you weren't topping a dude you were a sissy. COWARDS.