Gina

Me (shopping at Walmart): “what am I looking for?”
Son: “Mama, I know why I get distracted easily.”
Me: “Mmmhmmm” (suddenly interested in matching holiday PJs)
Son: “Because I came out of you.”

@colleenaf.bsky.social

While Junie B. Jones checks out the nursery for the not-a-surprise B-A-B-Y she doesn’t want her Mother to have, in the new graphic novel version, my son calls the crib a baby cage and insists I refer to it as such for the rest of the book. He empathizes with Junie. “I don’t want a baby,” he says.

Overheard at the polls:
“I just moved out of this district two weeks ago. Nobody knows. I didn’t tell anybody. I should be able to vote here.”
#voting #drama

Me: (fumbling over a made up word in a kid’s book)

My son: (proununing word flawlessly)

Me: wow, why am I so bad at saying that?

My son: because you’re old

This is worthy of a bookmark. I anticipate there will be a day very soon when I send this post to friends in response to something in the news.

Facts don’t care about the GOP’s feelings — there’s nothing more American than rejecting a mad king. Please join us tomorrow: www.nokings.org?SQF_SOURCE=i... #NoKings

This sounds like a whirlwind of fun! Remember water and to take breaks outside. The conference energy is fun and draining. Oh and Stop by the SLJ booth while you’re there 😉

Or is it from eating pizza for two days in a row?
Wait when WAS my last period? Was it right after the start of the school year? No that seems too long ago. <mild panic> BUT I’m perimenopausal. It is so rare to get pregnant RIGHT??! <frantically searches online>

Nine year old (dressed as the Grim Reaper): “Can I eat your soul?”

My son:

I do this thing when I’m stressed where I shove Doritos in my mouth mindlessly. I bet my husband thinks it’s sexy.

I am so tired of people calling things divisive when what they mean is that they were more comfortable when other people were just being silently oppressed and they didn’t have to hear about it or change anything

We believe that every person, of every age, of every race, of every gender, no matter who they love, or where they live, should have access to books that reflect and expand their worldview. #UniteAgainstBookBans #BannedBooksWeek

I wish I could go back in time 6 years and tell my mom-self not to purée homemade baby food. Save yourself the time and stress because we all eventually give our school-aged kids Lunchables. It is a modern parenting hack you won’t see on Instagram.

Ah! What’s the rest of the joke? I neeeed to know.

Ooh good tip. The random jump scares have ceased to be funny.

Introduce a dog and your brain reaches for the name of every dog you’ve ever owned or met. Luckily my son still thinks it’s funny when I refer to him as Piper (RIP) in a frenzied panic.

Son, ruminating about his Steal-A-Brainrot obsession: I don’t know how to get the Smurf Cat. I think it takes a Pink Elephant ritual. You put three pink elephants in a triangle & then some magic stuff sprays out & they disappear.

Me: Did I just spend $20 robux for my kid to join a cult? #parenting

6 yr old son: why does she get to stay up late? She’s younger and smaller than me.

4 mo. old puppy: [chewing my sandal]

Me: ???

A Captain Underpants book led to a conversation with my son about the possibility of an infinite universe. Take that book challengers! #ireadbannedbooks

I’m
Not
The
Only
One
♥️

Boycott ABC.

I hope you took this as a compliment. This morning my son said “Mama I’m going to say something mean. You have a big gyatt.” My response: thank you!! Some people really like big butts.

I did. It means…nothing. At this point. It seems to be a marker of being “in the know” which probably feels really amazing for a 6 year old.

Overheard on a 2nd grade field trip to an apple orchard:
“I have so much life to live.” -yelled by a 7 year old as she ran by

You earn 500 mom-aura points for treating your kiddo to 3 modes of transportation

This is the first post I’ve used the new bookmark feature with 🧡🦋

You’re awfully kind. Our meltdowns happen because snack isn’t allowed after brushing teeth. My son has learned quickly to refuse to brush his teeth saying, “I’m about to eat so what’s the point?” I have to give him credit for that logic.

Mine too. He found not one, but two, valuable rocks on the ground at the Renaissance Faire. Each time I said the fairies left them for him. And each time he informed me that I was wrong. Apparently people accidentally drop their valuable rocks.

“You can’t steal from the fairies” is a phrase I never pictured myself saying. Shout out to all parents who leaned in even at the Renaissance Faire. I see you. ✨ 🧚‍♂️