Catastrophic Megafauna

Hi. Maths called and told me you were a dickhead.

You’re NOT every woman Chaka Khan. YOU’RE NOT MY MUM

Follow the instructions.

Voodoo dolls at the ready, please.

Have a fab one spa. I was never going to make it with tomorrow's Mari Lwyd shenanigans, but I was sorely tempted.

I just screenshot the same thing! I hesitated a second assuming there was a connection.

Butter and pepper, surely.

It works as an alternative title for Carys Eleri's song Tit Montage, with absolutely no other variation in the show required.

No. They don't wash everything. It arrives needing to be separated into card, plastic, metal etc and if it isn't washed it stinks like hell while it's being sorted.

This could so easily have been the alternative title of Carys Eleri's song Tit Montage.

The scriptwriter has lost the plot on this one. They're using the team from Lost.

It was interesting. A nice bit of to and fro, but no exceptional action. Then over a 5 minute period it ramped up into a kind of revolution against football norms. Extraordinary!

Nice bit of poetic justice with that attempt.

I don’t have my HGV licence anymore. I gave it to Donald Trump

Vegas is probably my best ever too. Also saw him in the Glee and he sounded like he was fucked off with the management, so we had a whip round "to buy a better club" where we had to throw loose change at his naked belly. "Bloody hell. Some of them coins are 20s!" Classic.

Bloody lightweight opinion. All walls should be made of glass, everyone should be naked at all times because clothing is just another form of deception, and people should be prepared to supply a fresh X-ray, MRI or CAT scan daily.

Or maybe you should keep quiet until you're less entitled?

I'm not eating it. I'll trust your review.

Piss off. (But in Franklin Gothic Extra Condensed)

So, an iron cross, with the circle of a Celtic cross, which has been adopted by fascists Europe wide for decades, and what looks like be a spear of destiny reference. Well if it looks like a duck etc, it should be roasted until crispy then shredded into pancakes. It'll probs taste like shit though.

The Taff and the Ely, but also the Taf and the Cynin

One of the absolute best things about being a straight man is never having to place any emotional trust in another man. Sure, some men are responsible and thoughtful, even fun, but frankly the odds are crap. When women cotton on to this most men are fucked, or not fucked. Delete as appropriate.

Did AI write this? You were meant to be at a wedding, but accidentally went to a different one, that happened to have a bride you'd previously slept with, who was marrying a stranger resembling your unspecified relative, which was a good thing, but you'd have felt bad being where you actually were.

This is true, but this perspective makes Spurs a chuckle team too. Nobody (except Sunderland) found Newcastle's trophy drought as entertaining as Spurs's. What was the funniest part of their Europa league win? Beating Man U in the final. It would have been hilarious either way though.

We started with Spurs. I only added the others for context.

Looking at the positives, at least you didn't get a filthy arse covered in spilt drink dancing to this one. #totp

Signs of genuine audience enthusiasm for the 'Spring! Probably grew up a bit in between applying for tickets and getting into the show. #totp

Fuck my life aren't we done with this one? #'911' #totp

Sebadoh clearly have no fucking clue why they've been booked onto a children's show with a primary colour set and an audience who have no fucking clue who they are. #totp

I'm so glad you reassured us it was a toy. I couldn't handle the sudden crash in my perception of what a lovely guy Jeff is otherwise.

Oh come, come. We're far more diverse and accepting than that. Rooms full of strangers can be cheerily united around mutual loathing of Arsenal, Liverpool, Chelsea and both Mans U and City. Even little Millwall can inspire shared vitriol among people who couldn't even find it.

Stirring it? She's whacking the side with a hammer until it cracks!