Indoor Wife 💐

The Cousins Karamazov

I have learned the hard way why you never see gluten-free galakto-baklava… because it sucks. You need filo dough. There’s no way around it.

I wish there was an iPhone setting called “I promise I know where an apostrophe is supposed to go; please stop auto-correcting me.”

Dallas is the Midwest but with fire ants.

Did NYC elect a normal person to be their mayor? That’s crazy. As a Chicago resident, I feel hope that someday we too can elect a normal person to be mayor.

how to stop feeling like dale from king of the hill all the time

Another good reminder from today is that to win this we all need to get used to cooperating with people we sometimes find highly annoying

A reason im not moved by the “don’t give the trump administration the pretext they’re looking for” is that we would not dare say that about any anti-authoritarian protest movement in literally any other country

a woman wearing bunny ears and a nose mask says what is the tea Alt: Azealia Banks apparently not being a girls girl or whatever?

Read the scripture before you quote it.

hey for a split second i thought the past tense of "grab" was "grobe" thank you follow your dreams

My social class mobility dreams have come true. My husband did not knowing what a walking taco was until today.

Joe Biden voice: Man, will you shut up?

Asking the important questions.

Texas weather is insane

You get extra drama points if you’ve gone to the ER for this but don’t go for serious illnesses.

asking the guy peering down into my roma tomatoes if i'm being detained

Nothing in my Upper-Midwest life could have prepared me to experience a dust storm in Chicago.

Ugh I’m getting so many of these

Little girl before and after school.

My 401k Monday and Today.

yeeeeee jk rowling finally took the bait & replied to azealia banks on twitter 🍿

When people say, “date someone you have things in common with” that means values, vacation plans, and taste in TV/food. You don’t have to like the same stuff. In fact, my taste in music is terrible and I am relieved my husband doesn’t share it.

Girl, I KNOW! Crying.

We’re playing the long game ok. First I let him take all my important pieces. Then I drag my balls through broken glass and drive off a cliff

If you don’t know the words to Gucci Gucci by Kreayshawn, you aren’t a millennial.

Annual Fatigue Risk Management training is my least favorite, but at least I don’t have to do dangerous goods anymore.

Screen grab of Twitter post my pundit Matt Yglesias saying that California governor Newsom is not only correct on merit to oppose trans athletes, but that it's bizarre to see the Democratic party line up on an issue that is opposed 70-30.

Interracial marriage did not cross 50% approval in the US until 1996, when I was 30 years old. Good political messaging drives opinion, it doesn't follow it.