Jeff Foxworthy-of-Love

unpopular opinion but i think he should just go ahead and invoke the insurrection act

Philly will not win a title until their fans stop acting the way they do

Yankees are out

I wish he would’ve but Mr October has a brand to protect

YEAH WHY

Is there a 21st century Mel Gibson out there?

Imagine spending your whole life cos-playing and fantasizing about fighting the federal government sending troops in against its own citizens only to root for the government when the moment finally arrives

One side is dressed like the bad guys in every single sci fi movie about an evil government and they are whacking people with sticks and throwing flash bangs and tear gas, the other side has shopping carts and jeans and a t shirt, why don’t we ask the cops not to use violence?

If I ever find out I'm dying, I'm going to fly to Beverly Hills and die there. I don't care if I die in a cardboard box on the pavement, I just want Wikipedia to say I died in Beverly Hills. Like a big shot.

There is NOTHING (besides Xanax) that I would be willing to buy from some guy with a clipboard and lanyard

Kidz Bop “Goodbye Horses”

My friends thought the jigsaw bong was really funny so thank you

Getting more and more notifications about being followed by obvious bots. Twitter is back

Dog food

If you or I got gunned down on the streets of New York there wouldn’t be news coverage or a manhunt.

I am being shadow baned on Bluesky

Honestly a little taken aback to have made it to 50 followers on here so quickly. At the risk of sounding too “lame” I’m incredibly grateful to everyone who has followed me so far, it means a hell of a lot.

I’m doing my best to follow back as many of you as possible, I will get there. ❤️

So yesterday my daughter (9) was hungry and I was doing a jigsaw puzzle so I said over my shoulder “make some baked beans.” She said, “How?” like all kids do when they want YOU to do it, so I said, “Open a can and put it in a pot.” She brought me the can and said “tweets are called skeets now”

Would somebody in an echo chamber post this?

Finally got rid of twitter