3yo does this thing now when we’re leaving a playground etc where he acts willing to leave, but then starts walking backwards with eyes wide, saying “it’s pulling me back! It’s pulling me back!” Great bit. Didn’t know he was capable of bits yet.
20.02.2026 18:05 — 👍 29 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
I got in trouble for throwing away 3yo’s “wishing trash”. It’s trash that grants wishes.
16.02.2026 22:17 — 👍 16 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Hi Dude
15.02.2026 21:27 — 👍 38 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 1
Justin Guarini
15.02.2026 00:54 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0
11.02.2026 23:21 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Doug is gonna crack this wide open
10.02.2026 22:22 — 👍 28 🔁 0 💬 3 📌 1
Derry Girls too. Idk what the fuck anybody is saying
10.02.2026 00:35 — 👍 14 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
I had to put on subtitles for Downton Abbey so Bad Bunny don’t bother me none
10.02.2026 00:31 — 👍 21 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Me watching the halftime show
09.02.2026 21:06 — 👍 18 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
06.02.2026 05:40 — 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
really love Tim Allen’s website
05.02.2026 04:41 — 👍 61 🔁 5 💬 7 📌 1
warms
05.02.2026 00:59 — 👍 14 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0
what in the world
03.02.2026 20:36 — 👍 9 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0
Jelly Roll seems like he’s popular with people who smoke cigarettes inside their house
03.02.2026 17:02 — 👍 90 🔁 11 💬 0 📌 1
my only groundhog’s day meme
02.02.2026 13:39 — 👍 43 🔁 5 💬 1 📌 0
can you even imagine being like this
02.02.2026 06:20 — 👍 39 🔁 3 💬 3 📌 0
3yo may look like his dad but when he throws his food wrappers behind the TV table? That’s my boy.
31.01.2026 16:45 — 👍 13 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
god dammit
31.01.2026 04:19 — 👍 189 🔁 27 💬 1 📌 1
3yo: what does “focus” mean?
me: 🤷♀️ 🤷♀️ 🤷♀️
29.01.2026 04:30 — 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
I keep forgetting to tell my 3 year old his teeth are all gonna fall out
26.01.2026 02:40 — 👍 26 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0
the what???
25.01.2026 05:25 — 👍 22 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0
I watched 6 hours of Nick at Nite every night as a child but I’m still better off than the cell phone kids
24.01.2026 02:50 — 👍 20 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0
Me trying to childproof one (1) single outlet
23.01.2026 17:51 — 👍 37 🔁 7 💬 1 📌 1
Paul Blartrides
21.01.2026 01:28 — 👍 89 🔁 4 💬 8 📌 0
Usha Vance: hello, my love, please join me in our marital chamber
JD:
21.01.2026 01:30 — 👍 32 🔁 3 💬 2 📌 0
All I want for my birthday is an IU football championship thank you and amen
19.01.2026 16:54 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
There’s a support group on Facebook for grandparents who can’t see their grandchildren and there has been a mutiny
17.01.2026 22:01 — 👍 16 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
?????
16.01.2026 22:06 — 👍 17 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
I want to go sing this at karaoke
16.01.2026 21:57 — 👍 12 🔁 2 💬 1 📌 1
I pulled it out!
10.01.2026 23:54 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
present and accountable
24
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