Tony

You do be keeping it real! :)

Olive Garden says they're my family but they won't let me spend the night when I don't have a couch to crash on.

Remember its not just a mistake. You failed.<inspirational>

You don't necessarily need to say "image of" in your alt text for users to know it's an image. Screen readers will announce that it's an image. But it can help readers to specify if it's a hand-drawn image, Polaroid, infographic, screenshot, chart, map, diagram, or so on.

It's okay to be wrong sometimes 🐟

putting a rotisserie chicken on each hand and boxing people at costco

Careful. The rhythm is gonna get you.

buffet/funeral parlor R.I.P.izza

When will skeletons and ghosts realize they’re perfect for each other

Happy Caturday.

my fart just sounded like
a carbonated drink being
opened and now im thirsty

was something wrong with matchbox one through nineteen

The way the "moon" light shines through the trees reminds Them of how They will slice (some of) you to ribbons

"Do fries come with that shake?" Listen to yourself. Have you ever ordered food before

So it's either: these Christians are trying to create the end of days to ensure they are first in line in ruling the godless *or* rich disgusting men were blackmailing other rich disgusting men after they willingly participated in sex crimes?

These are my choices?

😭

walked, ate, peed/pood, checked in on my humans. now I nap 💭I could be a dog💭

A bed of angel hair pasta sounds so relaxing lol

Truth Coming Out of Her Well to Shame Mankind painting lol

thinking about how glaciers are just really patient rivers that decided to take a gap century 🧊✨

Not hype enough to make it in the modern world.

It's always "listen to your heart" then it's "omg thats too much caffeine"

I'm hungry enough to eat a billionaire

You came a long way! :) Glad so many found it fun, thanks for the intel

all aboard the struggle bus

*spends 20 years learning origami.

*folds the perfect paper girlfriend.

*gets serious paper cuts.

*dies of a broken heart.

Taking my glasses off and putting my phone right up to my face is as close as I am willing to get to people.

i just saved a bunch of money on my electric bill by being depressed and getting drunk in the dark

I'm hungry like the two wolves inside of me.

I don't have anything in common with people who don't give up everyday.