Toby Heppell

SHOCK POLL: NIGEL FARAGE WILL BE PM TOMORROW IN an amazing poll conducted by The Pointless Polling Company, it was revealed that voters' intentions may well change over the next three and a half years and at present it's 100 percent impossible to guess what the next government might look like. However, 99 percent of journalists agree that it would be much more fun if we had an election tomorrow and everybody resigned and everything was chaos and Farage had a go at being PM, just for the hell of it, because it was so much fun when Brexit happened and then the government kept falling every five minutes and we could write endless pieces about (cont. p94)

Private Eye offers up an excellently scornful commentary on the relentless polling. It’s become ridiculous and has oversimplified our politics to dangerous levels of stupid and irresponsible.

Plenty. But that doesn't stop it, potentially, being a net negative.

Maybe the tour is the Making of a Murderer...

Fuck sake. I'm literally just writing a Word document and saving it to my hard drive. STOP ASKING ME TO USE YOUR SHITTY AI AND YOUR SHITTY CLOUD SERVICE. Why is this decades old basic task such a fucking chore now? It's broiling my shit.

And yet we were still surprised when it went off...

Iconic moment at the Downton Abbey premiere

Second this, it's genuinely brilliant!

fancy forty-five minutes of impeccable sketch comedy? here you go: www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...

Word

Those crumpets were DELICIOUS

The fully clothed chaps

Delicious, warming, sewage doing it's thing.

This is the polling I want to see. (FWIW I have had, but not currently)

Really exciting new archaeology report showing that two people who died in 7th century Kent had West African grandfathers. It’s suggested they’d travelled here as traders and settled thanks to the Byzantine Empire’s trade network that linked North Africa to Britain

Banger of a salad - and as ever with home-grown it's free because it came from the garden!

(Never, ever consider the eye watering actual cost)

@calipaxton.bsky.social think you would appreciate this font action!

Since gerrymandering is in the news again, I think it well worth revisiting the etymology of the word.

A fellow called Gerry changed a voting district boundary, such that is looked like a salamander... Hence Gerry-mander

WHEN IS IT NOT SMALL BOATS WEEK THO??
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

When is it wealth inequality week, eh?? WHEN DOES THAT COME AROUND?

Newsweek’s infamous 17 July 1995 cover: “Bisexuality: Not Gay. Not Straight. A New Sexual Identity Emerges.”

A very happy 30th birthday to bisexuality, born this day in 1995 🎂

Okay. We get it. WeTransfer... something something T&Cs something.

'Free' is not, and never has been, 'free'*.

*not trying to advocate for WeTrans here

These were super tasty. But did look like 'David Attenborough's suntanned arm'.

Just had to Google that myself as there is not way that can be real...

Think you'll particularly enjoy this thread @calipaxton.bsky.social

Another go at baguettes. Still don't feel like I'm getting the score quite right. And I need to work out how to keep the crust crispy. #breadmaking #breadsky

My baby! 😍

Absolutely amazed to see that, once again, these local elections have confirmed every commentators pre-held beliefs / point of view.

I know, I'm ver ver eloquent.