Harrison

Chicago priest Fr. Larry Dowling describes procession to ICE facility: “No one had the courage to speak directly to us. No one from Homeland Security could stand in the presence of the Monstrance holding the Blessed Sacrament. No wonder. Evil is repelled, recoils in the presence of Christ.”

Soldiers at the Bass Pro Shops pyramid in Memphis, TN.

> It is 2025 BC. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis

> It is 2025 AD. I am a soldier from one of the outlying provinces called to defend the pyramid in Memphis

Incredible. No notes.

I mean, what are the odds it happens twice?

Hey! Cut it out!

honestly most weapons formed against me will prosper. hammer? that’s gonna get my ass real easy

Barnsley man in hospital after three-day cola bottles binge Nathan Rimmington ate his way through 3kg of sweets - and doctors were shocked he survived.

This happened to my friend @caulimovirus.bsky.social

www.bbc.com/news/article...

smurfs are the size they are because the lack internal structure. they are closer to gelatinous lichens than they are true fungi. they cannot grow larger without dedicated vasculature in our current oxygen environment. millions of years ago when there was more oxygen they were substantially larger.

I usually just cut them in half and count the rings

Caitlin Flanagan @CaitlinPacific I’ve missed hearing Woody Allen’s voice - I’d been so rattled this week and there he was, his full self. ⁦ @bariweiss ⁩ is the perfect interviewer. She seemed almost like a daughter to him - in a way she is. We all are. Order Life with Baum!

like a daughter to him

Disgusted barbie

Cotton candy, sweetie go
Let me see that tissue roll

edited comic panel. Batman is breaking a lump-with-handle cow tool over his knee and saying "this is the tool of the cow. we do not understand it. we will not use it."

it's not FOR us

the falconer? no, we haven't heard anything from him in a while. i'm hearing this for the first time. folks, our gyre is beautiful, some are saying the widest and getting wider. one of the widest ever, in terms of gyres.

Graphic showing the proposed pictogram warning of the dangers of buried nuclear waste for the Waste Isolation Pilot Plant.

In the first 100 days I will dig down into the place of honor. On day one I will issue an Executive Order that the radical woke warning signs be removed and anyone perpetuating the "dangerous and repulsive" lie to be terminated. I will restore the country by touching the ancient treasures.

they believe “criminal” is a kind of person you are, not a status contingent upon actions you take. J6 rioters going to jail was not an outrage because there are no laws they could break that would make them criminals, whilst innocence or guilt have no bearing on if others are criminals or not

"RFK Jr. is right" -RiderToast

"partisan split on Tylenol"

Calling poison control and asking if they have any free samples

🙏🤞

I'm teaching the computer to smoke cigarettes

It's not like you can get pancreatitis twice in the same pancreas.

Driveway lichen is a perfectly fine substitute for green onions in your recipes.

I would have fixed it for $136,660. You should have shopped around.

It's worth noting that the Republicans control all three branches of government and the Dems literally couldn't pass a CR on their own. So anyone who writes anything about Dems being responsible is not only lying, they're doing it in service to this administration.

um actually sweetie it is extremely problematic to say that South Africa is an "apartheid state"— using an Afrikaans word derogatorily like that is very racially coded and also Hendrik Verwoerd was neurodivergent and the international community was really abusive towards him

meanwhile at the Riyadh Comedy Festival

A fundraising text NEW MESSAGE FROM: Chuck Schumer Meredith, is there anything I can say to convince you to donate $20 (becomes $80!) to help take back the Senate majority

“I’m resigning from my position as Democratic leader and retiring from the Senate.”

the judge said i did such a good job representing myself in court that they're going to send me to gifted prison