Jorty Spice

Very powerful, ma’am

Saw a woman with a shirt that said “I HAVE DECIDED” with no other information

I have a suspicion of the subway takes guy i would deem “healthy”

In Gracie Mansion, Eric Adams is cheering himself up by watching a VHS tape of the concert where Curtis Mayfield got paralyzed by falling lighting equipment.

I love installing fonts

Had the thought that I should post this to bluesky and accidentally opened up Venmo instead

In 2026 we’re all gonna start saying “smoking onion” again. Yes, again. Read a book

Eating the illicit fourth hot dog arc of the covenant style

This dude’s name is not HARLAN STEED lmao come on

Proud of this one, been a huge fan of the menagerie of tyler projects for years

Love when people spell poser “poseur” hon hon oui oui

Just saw someone smoking a cigarette Blair witch style (facing the corner unmoving during October)

Bandido dragging washed Okada to the most interesting work of his aew career is the best evidence that he is the best wrestler of 2025

All skeletons are male

Just a little glimpse into my sick and twisted mind

Isn’t every margarita a lime-a-rita when you think about it

Pretty good guess for something I haven’t seen in 10+ years

I think bluesky accidentally served me alara reborn era magic the gathering art but I really am the target audience for this. I’m gonna try to remember the card’s name. Wicked occultist?

I think it’s kinda sick that other countries are like “this land is called Nippon” and we’re like “no, it’s Japan” and then if you call it Nippon you’re a little freak lmfao

Someone tried to talk to me while I was typing this and I definitely just finished it instead of saying hi

Isaac Brock really thought he had a point with “we kiss on the mouth but still cough down our sleeves” like yes bitch I am not coughing on people do you want me to??

I think all the time about how neon Indian created the only actual factual hazy digital shoegaze/chillwave hybrid with era extrana and then a few years later he was like “what if I was Prince but sometimes I did reggae” lmfao

Yeah it was awesome

What is the tush push

Please enjoy this podcast where I am described as “the angriest” person in a conversation about Kermit the frog

Seeing Lorde and Chanel Beads tomorrow, excited to be really mad at the crowd in the moment and then three weeks from now be like “yeah it was awesome”

At least Instagram has the decency to show me Top 5 Family Guy Vehicles Compilation damn

I wish this app was good but every time I boot up the algo feed it just serves me stuff like this. What is this. Why would you say this. Why am I seeing this

Autocorrect just changed “fuckable” to “suckable”

The most remarkable thing about you shitting in the toilet/is that it’s you/and that you’re shitting in the toilet

White people DONT Say their bandmate is an asshole Anymore. They say: [Adrienne Lenker’s long explanation about why a member is no longer in the band]