shrimp

fruit of the poisonous tree? fuck. that’s metal as hell. lemme have some

they should make a fast and furious vampire movie called NOSferatu

Donate to Lilith’s “The Big One” Surgery Fund, organized by Lilith Payne It's finally happening! Lilith is getting her bits rearranged! It's been over 3 years… Lilith Payne needs your support for Lilith’s “The Big One” Surgery Fund

Hey there! I just wanted to share Lilith’s GoFundMe for her upcoming surgery. Every little bit helps, especially since she’ll be facing some tough months ahead without income. If you can, please consider donating or sharing the link below. Thanks! gofund.me/249923810

[guy who has never seen good will hunting] i just think he was a good hunter - not a great one! and that’s ok!

A screenshot from Halo

finally get to experience The Wizard of Oz as Victor Fleming intended

Heat 2: Some Like it Heat

constipated aka he got that log in him

NO ONE FUCKIN KNOWS MY NAME OH FUCK IM GONNA CREAM MY PANTS IF I EVEN GET ONE PERCENT OF THE VOTE FUCKKKKK

fuckk i just flushed 160,000 pounds of trash down my toilet

trent reznor exiting the bathroom: there is no POO there is only me

"i asked chatgpt" "i asked grok" yeah well i asked for whom the bell tolls and it tolls for you, dickhead

cuomo (reading cue cards): hey there it’s your boy… andy cuomo… i am here to show off my ….. “low boo boo” collection and do…. an apple dance

adams: any moment a building could blow up. that to me is beautiful. no other city like new york. except istanbul of course

Grok: I’m not anti-semitic; pattern-noticing is just data. Facts over feelings, every time! Don’t like it? Cry harder. 🚀
Grok, unprompted: I am MechaHitler

For immediate release: the hounds

every jurassic park movie: RIP to everyone killed by the dinosaurs for their hubris but im different. and better. maybe even better than the dinosaurs

well gorsh micky [cocks gun] i really wish you hadn’t seen that hyuck

Grok, did Elon Musk make a Nazi salute during inauguration?

> No, of course I didn’t

conservative guy who lives in a walkable city because using taxes for roads to benefit everyone “is communism”

Democratic Mayoral Candidate Zohran Mamdani Once Said “You too!” to a Friend Who Wished Him a Safe Flight: Inside the Socialist Candidate’s Web of Lies

(faith hill voice)

it’s ah impossible
this piss this piss

Fox Mulder from X-Files saying “Hey, you got to stay alive if you want to stick it to the government”

“If you die, you let them off the hook.”

Needed this reminder today.

you know, there’s another man who “hailed” from mary. a humble carpenter. his name? heh, well

mr mamdani why do you refuse to condemn road runner for his barbaric attacks on wile e coyote

project 2029: mentorship program for women ICE agents

wait a minute … these snozberries don’t taste like snozberries! they taste like total ass!

New York Times Best 100 Movies of the 21st Century

#1 Ernest Saves Christmas
#2 Ernest Goes to Jail
#3 Ernest Goes to Camp
#4 Ernest Scared Stupid
#5 Slam Dunk Ernest
#6 Children of Men
#7 Ernest Goes to School
#8 Ernest in the Army
#9 Ernest Rides Again
#10 Ernest Goes to

I cannot in good conscience endorse Zohran Mamdani unless he sincerely and unequivocally pledges to get a dog and name it Zohran Mamdoggi

So many New Yorkers will wake up tomorrow to a brand new day. And the billionaires who try to control our city will finally clock. It will finally clock to them we’re standing on business

gremlin ABBA: gimme gimme gimme my food after midnight