Banana Graveyard 🏳️‍🌈

look, it's very simple. in America, rich criminals become president, poor criminals go to jail. hope that clears things up

when God closes a door he opens a window. "thank you, God", you say. "lmao JUMP" God replies

Her: What are you wearing?

Me: The soul crushing weight of years and years of shame and self-loathing.

über sticky

This might be the best in-a-nutshell description of the Democratic Party I have ever seen

The silence of Democratic leadership right now is why we’re here. Consultancy has neutered them all, afraid to take any stance at any time for fear of poll numbers. Useless.

what if we tried good instead of bad

My walk of shame is throwing out a McDonald’s bag in the Williams Sonoma trash can

me seeing an article about the 25 Hottest and Most Popular Celebrities: haha who are any of these people?
me seeing a screenshot of a horrible post by CeleriusAvignon8888, Based Viscount of the New Bayesian Duchy of Pure Reason: oh it's this fuckin guy again

Having to follow the law while our president breaks them is some next level shit

I set an alarm now I just need to find a purpose for waking up.

I thought I was ugly and fat

we were so trashed

that’s a horrible pic lol

I’m so ashamed 😂

one who is styled? I’m lost as per usual

What I’m doing here is tweeting. You’ll never convince me otherwise

terrifying if literal: computer chips

not quite as interesting as yours…. I regret all the concerts I didn’t go to 😭

I’ve finally become that angry old geezer yelling at the TV from his power lift chair, but instead of referee calls in college football games it’s Karen Carpenter reaction videos on Youtube

Serotonin: “You knew what this was.”

I can’t always transcend. Sometimes I require a brief dramatic wallow.

Pat Benetar
The Police
Flock of Seagulls
Parliament
They Might be Giants

Just translated a post from Latin and somehow I understand it less

I’m like if an inappropriately timed boner was wearing a men’s oversized shawl cardigan.

A weighted blanket but it’s a hobo

a small brown dog leaps up from behind a pile of crunchy brown leaves. her eyes and mouth are open wide, and her big floppy ears are extended out like wings to either side.

This is Annie. She freaking loves fall. 13/10 (FB: James Osborne)

Show me your sky

If you can’t take me at my black socks and tennis shoes you don’t deserve me at my white socks and sandals

Look the only reason I keep sending you reels is so I have somewhere I can look at them later