KZ_FREW

Some rather evil stuff is coming out of the computer lately

I have a great capacity to agitate people without trying. This can be amusing but usually it’s just a bummer.

I hate Microsoft for many reasons, including their habit of being the grammar police. "It's better to have no comma between these phrases" - hey pal, fuck YOU, I salt and pepper my prose with punctuation as I please. We used to be a proper fucking country.

Are we the baddies

This is not a life hack. Do not call it that. We left that millennial coded shit in the 2010s. Try expressing yourself in a novel fashion for once, pal. Maybe she'll finally meet your eyes with the interest you're longing from her.

I do this thing called Breakfast Day. It's where I eat breakfast for every meal and I don't guilt myself about it. This has proven beneficial for my morale

It takes me until about halfway through Tuesday to cope with the fact that the work week has come back once again

in the Good Timeline, it's the Guardians - Mariners playoff series

you'll never have to open an aimlab in your life if you are just Like That

I love the work I do, man.

Organizing and emcee’ing events where people can kick back, engage with one another, and let the good times roll. Best feeling in the world, seeing smiling faces.

All while partnering with cool brands to add the cherry on top.

Entertainment is my way of service!

I’m like American Psycho but instead of a threesome with two girls it’s just me and Ms. Righty. I put lipstick on her and I give her a pair of googly eyes, so it’s almost like the real thing.

In honor of Ohio’s porn ID law, I will confess that I crank my shit in front of the mirror with all the lights on and the windows open. Such a spectacle deserves an audience, even if it’s just me bearing witness to my own savagery

Why any of us

As I understand it, neigh

The AI collapse will crater the entire US economy in stunning fashion and I guess EA just wants to throw themselves onto the casket lmao

Amazing photos, looks beautiful! Congratulations Jacob!

Knocking on my neighbors' door and asking if they have a cup of love to spare

Looks beautiful, congratulations!!

My life mission was once to be the Least Cringe Milennial, which I have now achieved. It was not especially difficult. I’m currently wandering the realms — both corporeal and imagined — for a new, truer purpose

Kaleb is worth the read, his death is a staggering loss for us all. The world is dimmer without him.

“[…] try out some of those normal things you hear about and if you get bored that’s wonderful because we’re not supposed to get bored anymore. It turns out boredom is the Cadillac of feelings.”

A screenshot from the PlayStation 2 game Road Trip. In a residential interior, one apparently sentient car is talking to another apparently also sentient car: "Why am I called Wolf... That's cuz I pass all that ride with a ferocious bite..."

Dracula Flow guy

I thought "goated with the sauce" would have more staying power than it seems to have had. Maybe it wasn't so goated with the sauce after all

i posted this and logged off for ten days. i apologize. it would've been embarrassing if i died in the interim and this was my last post

Speedrunners love to put "Best Possible Time" in their splits but then you watch them and they're having the worst possible time.

The grape flavored Monster is pretty good. I usually hate grape flavor, it reminds me of cough medicine. But an energy drink is like cough medicine for the soul

Girls like it when you ask them questions. I can tell because they usually give me answers that beg further questions, and before long, I'm caught in a big old chain of responding to answers with questions like a Jeopardy! contestant

fuck yeah

true misery

Each incident makes our society that much more violent and I hate that our brilliant minds in leadership have sleepwalk ourselves into this madness

Is the word flaccid ever used for anything other than describing a soft member