Coleslaw-core

I like my dicks slick. a slicky dick, if you will.

Them: "What's your favorite thing to read?"

Me: "Memes."

I should call her.....

I hope it isn't the same judge from my last trial. He's had out for me ever since I got his kids into the slaw.

Yo, why are all you naked?

I promise that baggy of slaw isn't mine officer, I was just holding it for a friend.

I am petting cat.

Will it be on standard broadcast or cable?

Also, I watch the puppy bowl all day over the super bowl. Dog programming is best programming.

Come on over, we're making carnitas. And we have weed.

A meme of Chris Pratt with his excited face, twice. First says "when you buy your first R/C car" And the bottom matching image says "When you buy your 237th R/C car."

I have 3 and I already want another.

POV: me after getting home from work everyday. Except my cat isn't orange.

"I showed you my ear-holes, please respond."

I can't even remember the argument, but from the top of the stairs I said "fuck you" to him.

He ran up the stairs and beat the crap out of me. My parents then laughed at me for crying, when they found me hiding in a closet later.

He is a very sweet baby. He also is a wobbly kitty, and very very addicted to lap sitting.

My step-dad Gary is a great name for a baby.

I think it's one of the oldest names in the world. I think there was a Babylon king named that.

My place is a mess and covered in coleslaw. I guess you could say that I am a -SLAWB-.

I always do.

a man sitting at a table with his mouth wide open ALT: a man sitting at a table with his mouth wide open

Teenage me, when I realized that Korn's Twisted transistor was about a girl using her vibrator:

Picture of a grey short hair kitty, named Vivi, on a blanketed lap. His eyes are squeezed shut and it's almost bed time for him.

Eepy.

A thumbnail for a YouTube video titled "Kitty says something to me but I don't understand her" The thumbnail image is of a cute grey kitty looking up at the camera. It is a 6 minute video.

Mission accomplished on my end, good luck for yours!

Edna K. (But actually,me the Slaw-min) From the Simpsons doing her sexy performance to "Fever" while popping her bubble outfit with a cigarette.

Woke up a little extra horny this morning. So I decided to tempt you all. New profile pic. Come and get it, cuties.

a woman with curly hair is crying and the words mouthing yas queen are above her Alt: Illana Wexler of Broad city, mounting the phrase "Yas Queen" while lightly sobbing. Watch broad city on Hulu, it's fucking great.

GET IT, QUEEN.

Jesus Quark raised from the dead on Easter or something. Wait, no, it's fall.

He hath returned.

GIVE ME ROCKS. I desire to make a trail for my RC crawlers in my back yard.

thats crazy, you should peg me