Jake

He formally knighted Ser Duncan before he died, I saw him do it because they’re both my friend.

See Duncan the Tall is real. He’s real and he’s my friend and I knew Ser Arlan of Pennytree is real too. He died but he was real.

photograph from the 80's of the wrestler Sting wearing a Gold's Gym shirt and sunglasses, leaning against a shelf in a bookstore and positively cheesing at an open copy of The Far Side Gallery 2, a collection of Far Side Cartoons.

what if i told you, through the power of forensic analysis, we are closer than ever to knowing the exact Far Side cartoon that is making Sting smile in this iconic photo. 🧵 👇

Not that you asked, I just both feel the need to defend emotional investment in public figures and am also uncomfortable with the woobification a new inoffensive dude every two months.

Like, admiring the artistic vision of director and being disappointed they signed the Polanski petition is normal and good.

Getting deeply invested in the personal life of Jeff Goldblum after a successful marketing push for Jurassic Park 7 probably isn’t.

I think two things are true:

1) Being emotionally invested in a public figure who exemplifies traits you find admirable is normal and fine.

2) Developing that attachment to someone on the basis of “wholesomeness”is basically doomed to disappoint, especially for charismatic white middle age dudes.

Affordable access to handheld gaming PCs is a basic human right like healthcare or shelter.

Twitter extending character limits was the worst thing that ever happened to Trump.

DO IT. NOW.

Today is the only day you can post this:

'I Spilled My Soda,' Report Nation's Dopes

'I Spilled My Soda,' Report Nation's Dopes https://theonion.com/i-spilled-my-soda-report-nations-dopes-1819572671/

Confessions, Augustine of Hippo, circa 400.

what part of no weapon formed against me shall prosper don’t you understand old man

Silent Hill: Pyramid Head is a manifestation of the protagonist’s self-loathing and internalized guilt.

Resident Evil: This zombie’s a fuckin’ vampire, man.

“This Village… that’s where the Evil Resides.

I like Resident Evil: Village because there’s no false advertising. Within five minutes of starting the game there it is, the village.

Yes the famous English-Scotts-Irish monoculture.

fun fact: your internal body temperature rises when you are infected because viruses are using your body for peer to peer file sharing

Liquids 👏 do 👏 not 👏 have 👏 calories 👏

“Cooking oil has calories and you have to count that.” Listen to yourself. You sound insane.

“Of course he isn’t safe. But he is Good.”

if you're an older person who finds words like mogg and maxxing annoying, just starting using them. people over the age of 30 have the superpower to end trends by simply adopting them

Many say they want the subsidies restored alongside broader reforms to make health care more affordable for all Americans. "Both Republicans and Democrats have been saying for years, oh, we need to fix it. Then do it," said Chad Bruns, a 58-year-old Affordable Care Act enrollee in Wisconsin. "They need to get to the root cause, and no political party ever does that."

I hate every voter

walking around with red dots painted all over my body to confuse snipers

No, the thumbnail still shows up because the account was suspended but the video wasn’t deleted. That’s just what delisted videos do when you link to them, it won’t play the actual video when you click on it.

YouTube video by Rick Astley Rick Astley - Never Gonna Give You Up (Official Video) (4K Remaster)

No I wish. It’s still listed but you can’t watch it anymore:

youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ?...

As if things weren’t bad enough, apparently the original Never Gonna Give You Up video is getting delisted from YouTube?