John Daintree

Image of a smartwatch face showing the text "You've set activity goals. Is today your day to meet them?"

My new watch is a bit passive aggressive with its exercise reminders.

Hey, Edinburgh residents and Fringers. I've seen both these shows and both are excellent. Add them to your schedules, you won't be disappointed. London residents and nearbyers can catch @lesliegold.bsky.social through the following: linktr.ee/lesliegold

Final Sofa SoFunny of the season is going to be an absolute doozy!

Tuesday. 7:30pm. At the Angelic.

🎟️tinyurl.com/sofunnytues

@misterabk.bsky.social
@jessfuchs.bsky.social
@dickdenham.bsky.social
@thatbaldyfella.bsky.social
& more

This is your regularly scheduled reminder that you cannot, in fact, boil a frog in a pot by raising the temperature by degrees. Frogs aren’t stupid and they jump out when they get uncomfortably hot.

I am reminded of the glorious word "nibling"

Ah, bugger.

Hurrah!

I'll keep things crossed

leaves you in stiches.

Not going to Edinburgh for the Fringe this year but still want to see two of the most hotly anticipated* shows?

I got you.

Solo & panel show double preview, North London, one week today! www.jokepit.com/e/37649

Solo show only, South London, two weeks today! tr.ee/rb6pvh2N5W

*by me

🧵1/2

Just got me a ticket.

Hey @moderation.bsky.app you should unsuspend @slurmsmackenzie.bsky.social

Posting the PUBLICLY AVAILABLE contact details for MPs to complain about how they voted is not a suspendable offence no matter how many bedwetters complain

Sorry, WHAT?!

Took me a moment.

Inventor of the GIF, hearing about Notre Dame burning: oh no the jarjoyles

Very much this.

TONIGHT!

Can I get some love on this please, in the form of re-posts?

Unbelievably, some tickets remain for this, and I'd love to have a full house....

tinyurl.com/sofunnytues

Wish I'd posted this without the "very", but hey ho, you live and learn.

Church bells are very appealing.

What? The hole day?

I loved this interface. Still use it via a custom home screen app on my android phone.

Happy cake day Guy.

Hugs. X.

"Pieces of 7! Pieces of 7!" Parroty error.

Albert Bierstadt’s Rocky Mountain Landscape, oil on canvas, 1870. View of the Rocky Mountains, which dominate the painting - they're a mossy green, with one waterfall to the left and at least two narrow, silvery streams to the right. Some of the tallest peaks in the back are snow capped. in the foreground: a small copse of trees with green and orange leaves, a dark, shadowy meadow/grass with tiny pink flowers, a family of deer (doe, stag, fawn). The water between the mountains and the grass reflects the mountains almost perfectly. It's paradisiacal: the painting is about 40% clouds, which shift from pearlescent white to lavender (almost like moonstone) - they cling low to the mountains and climb up into the sky, obscuring its blue almost totally. Looks like the sun is in the upper right corner of the painting, though you can't see it, only its rays filtering through the clouds, touching the mountains and water below.

Albert Bierstadt’s Among the Sierra Nevada Mountains, oil on canvas, 1868 View of the Sierra Nevada Mountains. In the bottom right corner of the painting, there’s a patch of deep green grass and forest, seven deer (including one stag) and birds that look like geese or ducks flying into the water. The mountains occupy the entire background and most of the left side of the painting, some of the peaks in the far back are snow capped. Two waterfalls pour into water that's almost a gunmetal color with a blue tint, the water is mostly still except for a layer of silver mist in the far background and ripples where the birds and deer are. The waterfall and face of the mountain are reflected in the water's surface. The colors on the right side of the painting are warm and rich, but they become darker and cooler toward the left side, where the face of the mountain almost looks made of steely gray stone. Like the other painting, the sun is obscured but its rays are diffused through thick clouds that shift from a pale yellow to stormy gray.

I respect any motherfucker who can paint the hell out of light & water

Not gonna lie, I love that stuff.

The word 'Alphabet' comes from the first two letters of the Greek alphabet.

Alpha & Beta

Welcome. @coffee-kev.bsky.social . Good to see you here.

Heat gun'll sort it

An excellent one-two. Kudos to you both.