MF FairyPrincessSmoo

Hear me out.

Everyone knows the old "You can fascinate a woman with a piece of cheese" thing, so what if we got a bunch of gold things, like Ferrero Rocher wrappers or whatever, and just made a little trail leading off a short pier

Fire Marshal: "There are too many kung fu fighters in here"

He said he was shooting blanks, but he doesn't look like a basketball player

Hmm, I'll ask him how much he scores... brb

Why would anyone want to be normal? Look where normal has gotten us

oh my ass?

i think you mean my twerk of art

Love you sis

Rest in love ❤️

Thanks everyone. Sorry for not responding to you all

Make sure you hug your loved ones hard, for you and for me

And fuck fucking bastard cunty cancer

Thanks Tony ❤️

It really fucking is

My sister is about to pass away and quite frankly, I’ve just about had enough of all this shit

I imagine what all of you smell like based on your profile pic

My five year plan? Probably just to say, “I’m really not feeling it today,” 1,825 times.

shit posting for freedom

There should be a “skip to the point” button for conversations.

AAAAAHHHHHHH

Always wear black to therapy to prove you can't be helped.

"My door is always open."

-- World's worst submarine commander

People are the real problem, not the animals.

extremely adorable if literal: sweater puppies

Roses are red
Pumpkins are orange
Poems are stupid

gonna start posting like a bot, just saying hi in everyone’s post replies

One of my favorite things to do is to eat peanuts in the corner.

i didn’t set out to become one of the best ice cream eaters alive but sometimes you just go where the spoon takes you

Me on the toilet: HEY I NEED SOME TOILET PAPER

6: *running around dressed like a mummy* we're all out

[gardening] heheh im in my hoe era

I shaved my Ewok for this?

~ me at the Star Wars convention

pronouncing unstable like constable

My mother in law is so strange

It’s raining super hard and there she is, outside my locked door challenging me to another game of charades

This is a cause we can all get behind 🙌

I feel like the future of this world depends on making this happen