Dave Heilker

Fuck The New York Times

AI "Artists" getting upset when you say their slop sucks is funny, because you can be like "why do you even care, it's not like you actually made it" and get them more wet and red.

This is hell

Somebody Tell Jimmy I Threw Away (Ate) His Cheeseburger

black & white webcomic by smee_bucket (@smee_bucket on ig) panel 1: lion king satire. mufasa, the powerful reigning lion ruler of the pride lands, hangs off a cliff, his foreclaws digging into the ledge. “scar help me I’m slipping,” he says panel 2: scar, his lithe, villainous (and gay-coded) brother, leers at mufasa and says “self care is cutting toxic people out of your life” 3: mufasa’s eyes bulge in shock and anger. “WHAT” 4: exterior shot of cliff as scar pushes mufasa off the cliff. “YOU ARE SO VALID,” scar assures mufasa. “what the heck”, a falling mufasa mutters 5: cut to bottom of the canyon. mufasa lies dead on the ground. his cub son simba is at this side, tears streaming down his little face. scar stands over them and gloats. “good vibes only,” he pronounces. 6: scar, having usurped his brother’s throne, now surveys his holdings atop pride rock. his hyena minions look up at him adoringly. “this sparks joy,” he purrs.

a wild toddler is on the loose shooting people in the US

ummmm why has nobody stopped it yet??????

Some people genuinely struggle to comprehend just how horrifying qualified immunity is in practice. People want to believe it's about split-second, lives-at-stake, no-good-options decisions by police officers. Their minds refuse to believe the kind of facts routinely blessed by district courts.

Yep. Federal and local law enforcement use these surveillance programs to monitor organizers on the ground. Important to put this info out but shouldn’t surprise any of us.

Multiple agencies, including her office, should have known South Baltimore party needed policing, co... Many city entities and individuals, Phylicia Porter says, knew about the annual block party – or should have known – and made arrangements for it to be properly secured.

In which a sitting council member blames the Tenants Council of a Public Housing Project for a mass shooting.

Eric Adams is just Jack Young written by Adam McKay

it's kind of amazing that literally every basic chat program today is less functional than AIM was 20 years ago *and* spies on you

FBI Hired Social Media Surveillance Firm That Labeled Black Lives Matter Organizers “Threat Acto... A new Senate report calls out the FBI for lying to Congress about its social media monitoring, pointing out the FBI’s hiring of ZeroFox.

The cybersecurity firm ZeroFox called BLM organizers "threat actors."

Then the FBI hired the company as its primary social media monitoring tool.

Then the FBI lied to Congress about it.

@kenklippenstein.bsky.social reports https://theintercept.com/2023/07/06/fbi-social-media-surveillance-zerofox/

All of the government’s anti Tiktok stuff makes more sense when you learn that Tiktok denied the alphabet orgs (FBI, CIA, etc) access to their user data.

What America needs is a gritty Young Sheldon reboot where he becomes a heroin dealer

Mort Crim on the show Detroiters announcing his Chump of the Week, Elon Musk. Photo has Mort at his channel 4 news desk and on screen is a picture of Elon without his hair plugs.

"You know what? I'm gonna do something I usually reserve for the end of the show, but I'm doing it now...𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘶𝘦 𝘪𝘵, 𝘋𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘦!...Elon Musk, local businessman and liar, is my "Chump of the Week." And that's that."

Photo of a kindle screen with an ad for a self published book called GLORY OF THE PACK: A JOE THE WEREWOLF NOVEL and a very poorly drawn cover of a man in a t-shirt standing amongst wolves. Additional text says “A murdered werewolf. Packs from another state. Can Joe put the pieces of these puzzles together before tragedy hits lowa werewolves? Read now SWIPE TO UNLOCK KINDLE”

I cannot believe the ad supported Kindle is *less* expensive!