Flups

You have my deepest sympathies, my friend. Would you like me to pick you up on my pimped-up milk float?

Don’t turn this around on me, my friend. I’ve held in several gallon of piss for hours. On the plus side, at least it smells of humbugs.

Not that well, I’m still waiting for you to pick me up. The puffins are furious and I’ve now pissed myself seven times.

No, just Frogspawn Hub.

You would last about two seconds. It’s a strange place, my friend x

Oh blimey! I dread to think what @kirstycustard.bsky.social posted 😄. I had the best time, she is a wonderful lady. Thank you for checking in 😊

Eldestdaught’s boyfriend sent me this photo earlier of a visitor who’s taken up residency in a trainer in his porch. Obviously, I hilariously responded with “That’s not a trainer, it’s on OPEN TOAD SANDAL”.

That is a very strong look.

The baristas terrify me.

Please tell me you still dress as Spider-Man?

Just wonderful.

That is an adorable photo.

You are a very considerate friend.

Excellent news. I’ll carry on crossing my legs.

If spam finds its way to an egg which is between two slices of bread, there’s a chance the sandwich could become pregnant.

Please be grateful that I didn’t go with ‘Spam: do you swallow or spit?’.

I don’t wish to seem needy but where the hell are you? I’ve eaten all the humbugs and the potted meat sandwiches. Plus I’m absolutely busting for a piss.

Oh wow! He’s an absolute inspiration, give him a big hug from me next time you see him.

No black pudding. Chorizo can be a bit…stringy. Corned beef though 👍

Oh god!

Did he hang around the premier reindeer lap dancing bar ‘Rude Dolph’?

I don’t wish to boast but I’m a lady and have both a kitten and scones.

I have Sundayitis
The weekend’s gone too soon
The dread’s the same as when I heard
The Bergerac theme tune
Why can’t it still be Saturday
Instead of Sunday night?
Another week of working starts
Tomorrow which is shite.

©️Flups

Kittens smell nice too. And freshly baked scones. They’re definitely not ladies.

Not always, my friend.

Awwww!

A lady? Did she wave her fan at you in a seductive manner?

And if you drink a ‘Beneking’ you can eat some ‘stand by meat’.

Or something.

How did you get back home? Did Duke hang about in dog bars until home time?

It is, yes.