Crispy T

You know, it is made with children under the age of 4 #SoylentHam

Are you "girl drink drunk"?

Party 🎉

Tonight you're gonna part like Space 1999 #BallinLikeMartinLandau

In your case, Joe, it is your fault. Whatever the issue. Your Bad. No passing the buck here. #YouWereRightAtFirst #WhatAreWeTalkingAbout

Joe, get up on your roof and blast REO Speedwagon's "Riding The Storm Out" while in your underwear. 🩲 Your neighbors will love it! #WhyIsThatOldManOnTheRoofInTheRainInHisUnderwear? #IsHeSenile?

The week does seem shorter when you pass out for a portion of it! #LostTime #NoMakeUpNeeded

Where's the "The"? #DefiniteArticleMakesAllTheDifference #BrutusBrownEye

Where's the Engelbert Humperdinck? Where is the Anne Murray? No Enya? #CmonYouTube #PutTheRhythmInAlgorithm

Am I the only one who wants to go to a Morrissey concert just to throw some White Castle burgers at him? #ICantBeTheOnlyOne #SignTheWrappersJohnnyMarr

the President is like 30 seconds away from bombing Tehran and the VP is doing transphobic own-the-libs shitposting on Bluesky (yes, this is a real account he just set up). This is ridiculous man. Like a reverse Dick Cheney where the VP has no power and is being totally sidelined on foreign policy.

A sure sign you're aging: you are grocery shopping and you think to yourself "Wow, they're playing pretty good music in here today" #JammingInTheJamAndJellyAisle #CheckingOutTheMusicInSelfCheckout

NPR story A crow's math skills include geometry

This is pretty fucked up because I can’t do geometry. The bird is smarter than I am.

Is he including the couple of islands with the penguins? #IHearPenguinsAreToughNegotiators🐧🐧🐧

My baseball ⚾ obsessed wife was horrified when I referred to the "thrower" instead of the "pitcher" when they showed all the balls he'd thrown in one graphic, which would be cool if he could really throw that many balls at once #Thrower #MLB

J.D. Vance - "The American People have been lied to. I was told there would be penguins, and literally nothing is GREEN here! President Trump said take the family to Greenland; bring it back as a souvenir. I can't believe it is so cold and no penguins! " #GuylinerGoesToGreenland

What good does that drink do me in New Jersey, where it gets dark too early, or so I've heard...

Just finished this book; well worth the read!

In a world of Kid Rocks and Carrie Underwoods, be a Woody Guthrie.

Some quite tasty stuff tonight!

Did your child lose their book collection in the Los Angeles fires? Are you a teacher at a school that lost its library or your classroom library? Whether you need one book or a whole library, we can replace your books. 📚

Everyone else, please boost this post so we can connect with those in need. 🙏

You know you're serious about keeping your food in its place when you purchase a blender called The Obliteraror #FuckThatFoodUp

Naming a Pink Floyd Tribute band Sweet Caroline would confuse them even more, especially if they then inserted "Baa Baa Baaaa" into the track from Animals called Sheep. #SoDamnMeta

@solarsystemwolf92.bsky.social Hello and welcome to a social I am finally on! #HowManyCrispysDoYouKnow

A clean Pad Thai restaurant is good, but Sanitary Pad Thai is questionable #SplittingPubicHairsButImportantDetails

Why didn't more people shout "This shit crazy!" during Lawrence Welk? #AlwaysWondered #DidTheLennonSistersDropItLikeItWasHot

I will have plungers 🪠 and cutting implements at the ready. You're not leaving me with a Yule Log 🪵 (meaning 💩)

The desired effect is what you get when you improve your interplanetary funksmanship #Parliament #MakeMyFunkThePFunk