[forest]
ME: omg there’s a wolf
WIFE: where?
ME: no the regular kind

YouTube video by Top All Sports MLB \\ Jackie Bradley Jr Defensive Highlights

do some box breathing and watch Jackie Bradley Junior catch everything for five and a half minutes youtu.be/GyR7IDpjy_s?...

hey man, nice fucking staff. it’s so gnarly. what is that, ebony? you’ve got an orb on top and everything. you gotta introduce me to your orb guy

Dreamed a new McDonald’s breakfast sandwich with 1 lb. of egg whites called “The Wet One”

Little League Pitcher Just Getting Fucking Shelled

Little League Pitcher Just Getting Fucking Shelled
theonion.com/little-...

hey Provincetown why don’t you save some hydrangeas for the rest of us

The person who named them woofers and tweeters should have named more stuff.

one of the single best deals in streaming. i've been paying for PBS Passport for years. it rules

What a gorgeous day 🎾

imagine stealing $179 million from doctor temperance brennan and special agent seeley booth what a moron you’d be

Trey is the Mann

The Mann

"GOOD FUCKING RIDDANCE"

Natural deodorant crystal, call that a deode

NYC Comptroller Brad Lander was just arrested by Trump’s ICE agents because he asked to see a judicial warrant.

This is fascism and all New Yorkers must speak in one voice. Release him now.

Weather is getting nice, what if 10 million people went outside at the same time

That bird is made up of all the most popular Starter jackets from the 90s.

the pacers are screaming murderers on jetskis

A man in a sunny kitchen wearing a knee-length blue nightshirt. He’s CASUALLY holding glasses and a magazine. On the counter is a coffee cup, a small glass bottle of melk, and a wire basket with brown and white eggs (presumably straight outta the hen)

Oh hey, I didn’t see you there. I was just being in my big nightshirt

imagine you and all your buddies die in a storm and everyone is like wow The Perfect Storm

Cold plunge tub salesman: in an ideal world, how would you start each day
Me: cup of coff-
Him: that's right, a simulation of an ice fishing accident

SOME ITALIAN MAIN COURSES
ARE THE ONES WITH RED SAUCES
SOME ITALIAN MAIN COURSES
ARE THE ONES WITH RED SAUCES
SOME ITALIAN MAIN COURSES
ARE THE ONES WITH RED SAUCES
SOME ITALIAN MAIN COURSES
ARE THE ONES WITH RED SAUCES

🎵

FILLING BOLOGNESE, HUH?

I miss that rideshare moped company Revel so much. I had such a great time with those, never felt freer. It's too bad all of those people died on them.

Eric Adams is amazing because when he won every media person was leaping over each to go “this is the normal sane leadership that the political left doesn’t understand normal sane Americans crave” and then every day since that Eric Adams has been like “Leprechauns are real and I’m going to cook one”

Love to see the economy go "the Pirates have optioned closer David Bednar to Triple-A" mode.

I think it’s a straightforward “Fuck all outies”

X, The Everything App seems to be reporting that Tracy Morgan puked enough to significantly delay this Knicks game, which is not good

I love to call my Senators' offices three times per week and try to cajole them into doing the most elementary political messaging and strategy. This is what it means to be an engaged citizen: leaving a strenuously polite voicemail for a 74yo on a more regular cadence than I talk to my parents.

the hubris of a severance skip review clicker

Senate Democrats are holding another closed-door emergency meeting to determine which color tie or dress to wear to indicate you oppose the CR while voting for the CR. I'm hearing that they've narrowed the choices down to seven.

usually have four dish rags going