doctor ennui

we refused to leave our 9th grade dance until they played sandstorm so obviously I just put it on the wedding playlist

being in your 30s is knowing this is just a line but living for it anyway lmao shhh let me have this

got carded at the gas station and when he looked at my id he said "why do you lie?" and nobody has ever had as much self confidence as I do right now

CAESAR: Hey dude
CAESAR: Any big Ides plans
BRUTUS: 💬
BRUTUS: 💬
BRUTUS: 💬
BRUTUS:

Screen grab from One Punch Man. Saitama "don't bother me when I'm shopping" and chopping Goro.

breakdown of every like a dragon game:

30% cut scene
10% important mission fight
60%

around here you know we like to advocate for launching greg abbott into the sun but also be sure ken paxton is strapped in tight with him

purposely got a phone that kind of sucks so I don't get lost looking at trash all day and so far it's been working!!

*posted from the good phone that I keep stashed away for when I need Features

being an adult is so embarrassing. “guys I’ve been doing a good job sleeping lately.” Jesus christ.

yeah i’m doing okay except for the fact that the void is growing and soon the darkness will swallow me whole

A large tractor tire, with smaller tires packed inside it

[David Attenborough voice] A tire…and her young.

it would be so much easier to throw everything we're getting rid of away instead of separating and identifying where things will actually have a positive impact but throwing it away wouldn't let me maintain my superiority complex so let's go girls

can you imagine suing a fair for not letting a man with a gun in? SUING a FAIR

Frisco Wolf Muscle Plush Squeaky Dog Toy, Medium/Large with an image of a weirdly buff anthropomorphic wolf

"dog toy"

I've described my adhd as like having 10 televisions running all at once in my head (adderall lowers the volume on like 6 of them) and one channel is ALWAYS the "you're the fucking worst shut the fuck up" channel just girly things

anyway spanish class has been going really well

my personal favorite part of How I Am With People is that the whole time I'm talking I hate myself but I don't stop and then it's time to leave and I think about it for days and hate myself even more and then when I go back I DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN

A picture of a spherical bird with a rainbow parachute labelled "The PlayStation can produce mind-boggling effects"

photograph of a picture frame, probably intended for baby ultrasounds, with the words "A moment in my belly, a lifetime in my heart" written on the picture frame

every adult over 30 has a sandwich that they had one time that could easily go in this picture frame

it was a bad experience for all parties involved!!!! my husband was NOT pleased about being recruited to help and Friend is anything but to me right now

acting more Christlike in the marketplace of ideas (overturning tables, whipping merchants, telling everyone to get the fuck out)

love any show with the premise "mentally ill sluts" put that shit in my veins

super embarrassing but this little chore bird has changed my life so if you've had 100 chuds tell you buying a planner could fix you I would recommend giving Finch a try

this is my daughter Worm and I do everything for Her 🩷

I love reading about your relationship because I ALSO somehow landed a perfect husband and it's such a nice change of pace from trying to relate to people constantly going "you know how men are (derogatory)"

White woman with bright red hair

don't worry I'm hot again

An illustration of a dragon, contained in the dragon are the words "Hell," "Execution," "Guilt," "Loss of friends," and "Prison."

sunday morning vibe check

Black dog resting sleepy head on skein of yarn

hey girl I'm actually using... nvm sweet dreams

Oh! No no no. That wasn't magic.

That's just me shutting off my feelings.

Going Through It

just unironically said "the new yarn fucks" in case you were wondering how someone who was cool in their 20s is handling their 30s (poorly)