Chrysa

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I work as an elder and hospice caregiver, which I am oddly passionate about. I can love on them shamelessly and no one complains about my codependence. It's a win-win situation. Many of my caregiving colleagues complain about the repetitive questions and, sometimes reactions, of the elderly, especially when those patients happen to read the newspaper, especially with the current downward spiral of our country — as if these people haven't lived through enough horror... I love my dementia peeps, but sometimes wonder if there's a Guinness Book World Record for how many times an hour a dementia patient can repeat the same question — it's got to be in the hundreds. At least with small children, they ask different questions. Dementia patients will get stuck on one short question and ask it until you can interrupt their train(carousel) of thought and successfully redirect their attention. That carousel is pretty manic sometimes. A couple days ago, I picked up my mail from the post office and drove over to the nursing home to take (let's call her "Miss Daisy") Miss Daisy out for a drive. Before we took off on our road trip, to the end of The Road and back, in our landlocked little town (Juneau, Alaska), I set my copy of The Onion down in front of her. Over our two-hour excursion, tiny Miss Daisy read that front page at least a dozen times and each time she would snicker, giggle, and guffaw, then put it down on the dash board and, a minute later, discover it anew. I think it was the best afternoon of my life. We don't often hear them laugh and when they do, it's the sweetest thing you've ever heard. ... Thank you, thank you, thank you, for the really important work all of you do. You make the world a better place.

I got permission to share this, and I'm extremely grateful for that.

The Onion got this letter from one of our subscribers in Alaska. She works with dementia patients and decided to leave a copy in the car for each one.

This email made my year. Read it and you'll see what I mean. People are good.

Pamphlet from the “Simpsons” titled “so you’re going to die”

Republicans better get started on printing their pamphlets.

I've never understood why politicians sell public transit like "We need the rich to pay for the poors!' Instead of, "A better transit system will take cars off the road and will mean you get places more quickly."

Just incredible

We had this shit virtually eradicated. Great job, anti-vaxxers.

You’re incredible, Mina. Those dudes screaming that at you are insecure and jealous. Keep up the great work!

I’m mocked, but I’ve been carrying mine ALL THE TIME for at least 9 years.

Yep, my best friend works as a camera person for pro baseball/basketball and college FB. She talks to the other women on her crew about how they don’t have the luxury to be bad at their jobs.

Every game show on Game Show Network feels like something out of the mind of Kenneth Parcell.

Unfortunately, this will not happen. He could tell Rs he wants them to eat a big pile of dog shit and their only question would be, “sir, should I use a fork or a spoon?”

I just texted my sister, “I don’t know how he has the energy, but Cory is texting me!”

This image haunts me…

Thank you for fighting for us.

Of course they are.

Just gotta sit here and work like everything’s normal while Melon pulls an “Ocean’s Eleven” on the government? Cool cool.

She’s so lovely. Yay!

I’m hanging on solely bc I want to read his obit one day. That’s it.

Hurry up, Asteroid.

Good… I’m an American and I support this.

Por que no los dos?

Looting our country… as we told you they would. FFS.

Dumbest fucking person does dumbest fucking thing… gee who could have seen that coming? Oh yeah, all of us who voted for Kamala.

We are all getting massively fucked over because so many of you are such racists (and misogynists) that you can’t get out of your own way.

Omg… when they groom you it’s both sweet and painful.

Oh, you can do that. Cool. Cool.

Most of us are barely keeping it together.

Then CA should stop sending money to the federal government. This is NOT how it works. JFC.

Oh, the accuracy. I was thinking this morning how airplane travel used to feel so fun and exciting. Now? I dread the entire experience.

The Pop Tarts Bowl. Something that unites us all.