🍉 Lani Shani 🪐

I found a very important note on my phone:

GIMME COOKIE

Happy Capricorn season!!!

Blueskiiiii I didn't forget about you (I kind of forgot about you).

Don’t knock masturbation. It’s sex with someone who thinks I’m funny

It’s funny to read over the alleged shooter’s posts and reflect that X is now optimized for precisely this Type of Guy

MS DOS

Accurate

I wish Warren Zevon were alive to write a song called “Busted At A McDonald’s In Altoona.”

Christmas is actually supporting Islam this year

Being a Seattle meteorologist would be the best job, you could be like oh yea its gonna rain and then it doesn’t rain and you can just go “Seattle! am I right folks” and then go get drunk at the Pink Door

Even without astrology, by association and his status. Billionaires are all evil, all of them

It sucks that after I die I won't get to see how sad everyone is that I'm gone.

Since my natal nodes are in the 11/5h I will always have a 12h year with my nodes in the 12/6 ... 😒

Saturn

Putting ingredients in little Pyrex bowls makes me feel like a real friggin Top Chef

It's exhausting tbqh... But I'm more afraid for them to move in my 6/12

There are always gonna be a handful of irritating people at work, but I feel so blessed that I have so many associates who are genuinely awesome people. 😭

An associate gave me this wallet bc I "reminder her of Lisa" 🥹

Yesterday, another associate, who barely talks, made a point to tell me I had good music taste (they finally gave us a speaker again). 🥹🥹🥹

a woman in a wedding dress is laying in a bed with her hand on her head . ALT: a woman in a wedding dress is laying in a bed with her hand on her head .

Venus entered Aquarius

My fav Venus in Aquarius celebrity is Sade. Her most famous song is called “No ordinary love”

This app needs more random dudes bullying 20something guys for having ED.

Okay? Cry harder.

DAVE!!!!

SpongeBob fish lady unbothered

This Mars ℞ I’m channeling whatever she is on

Derenged online leftists are celebrating the death of Ebenizier Scrooge

They're really underrated, honestly.

only idiots rob banks. i rob zoos. i have 47 meerkats

Your 5th saved screenshot is your Mars Rx lesson:

The lesson is y'all need to get on my level lol

PRIEST: do you have the ring

ME: *still staring into my fiancé’s eyes* yes on dvd

three giftcards that say in large font across the front: Her, Him, and Online

the three genders