Lee Melville ツ 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 💙

The Annoying Gentleman painting, except the the young lady is now the Oompah-Loompah from the disastrous Wonka Experience and the gentleman is The Unknown.

The Distracted Boyfriend meme, but the boyfriend is now a house brick, the girlfriend is the guy who got bricked during the Farage Riots and the object of the brick's attention are brickman's jogging bottoms.

The Drowning Kid meme. The absent-minded mum is labelled as GREGG WALLACE, her daughter is labelled as TOTAL WAR SAGA: THRONES OF BRITTANIA and the kid, well, he's Gregg's overlooked son.

The Bike Fall meme, except it's Liz Truss riding the bike, ramming the stick in her spokes and blaming the Underground Transgender Mafia for her downfall. She really is a mentalist.

2024: A Year in Pictures

31.12.2024 11:34 — 👍 62    🔁 18    💬 1    📌 0

With the Ghost Stories for Christmas season edging ever closer, here's a list of my FAVOURITE BRIT TELLY HORROR THINGS that I put together last year...

24.11.2024 12:59 — 👍 340    🔁 62    💬 22    📌 8

Grab your stocking fillers here!

higglebees.etsy.com

22.11.2024 13:42 — 👍 26    🔁 16    💬 1    📌 5

Hmm. This might be tricky. OK. a sequence of 6 images, all taken from Alfred Hitchcock's 'Psycho'. The 1st image shows a woman in a shower with a dark figure standing behind the shower curtain. The woman's head is a potato. The 2nd image shows the figure drawing back the shower curtain, but they're in shadow due to the light, so we cannot make out who they are. They're wielding a potato peeler. The 3rd image is the potato-headed woman with her back to the shower wall, terrified by this sudden intrusion. Well, I say terrified, but having a potato for a head makes it quite difficult to see what she's actually feeling, so you'll have to trust me that she's scared. Image 4 shows the water from the shower draining away down the plughole. There are potato peelings in the bottom of the bath. Image 5 shows the potato-headed woman slumped against the wall of the shower, her hand held up in defence, but it's too late! Her head is now a peeled potato. The 6th and final image shows what would normally be Norman Bates, sitting in the police station with a creepy smile on his face, but it's not Norman. It's the Tayto Man mascot from the Northern Ireland crisp dynasty (not to be confused with the Tayto Man from the Republic of Ireland's crisp dynasty. Google it.). Anyway, the Tayto Man is smiling. The wording on the final panel says "ALFRED SPUDCOOK'S TAYTO".

From this week's 'Fruit and Veg Movies' image challenge on b3ta.
Might need clicking to see the full image.

22.11.2024 13:46 — 👍 29    🔁 6    💬 1    📌 0

Math problem. I have three apples and am traveling towards you at 17mph. It's not really a problem, more of a warning. Apple time, bitches.

22.11.2024 05:09 — 👍 7093    🔁 1060    💬 143    📌 46

Daily Mail headline: Prankster fools Selfridges staff three times into getting rude words printed on jars of nutella - Seamas O'Reilly, from Derry, Northern Ireland, came up with the jokes - Staff in Oxford Street store made to put 'bumgravy' and 'backdirt# on jars - One poor worker was even convinced that 'arsemuck' was an Irish name - The 30-year-old admits he's spent £19 and doesn't even like Nutella

What's the stupidest thing you ever got in trouble for? I have... a few, some of which I've detailed here before.

But you might not have heard about the time the Daily Mail did a bullet-point scare job on me in 2016, because I tricked Selfridges staff into printing rude words on some Nutella jars.

21.11.2024 12:58 — 👍 868    🔁 162    💬 63    📌 25

Love your wee phone wallpapers - couldn't decide so purchased two, for both my home and lock screen 😍

15.11.2024 12:47 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0