Ashhole

Inglorious bastards 3 dot jpeg

when someone I thought was normal says "seed oil"

I feel like I need to point out that people like Jake Tapper didn't go to school to be journalists, they went to school to be commentators. And they'll be commentators for whoever pays the big bucks.

Gotta hand it to Naughty Dog if they were playing the long game. I didn't realize how okay The Last of Us Part 2 would be compared to how bad the season 2 adaption has ended up.

As far as genetics go I've lost every lottery, scratch off ticket and the last few cents of my paycheck to a gas station store credit slot machine, but at least I didn't get the gene that makes cilantro taste like soap.

When you see a conservative influencer calling the Kendrick performance a DEI thing it’s worth keeping in mind just how many conservative influencers are failed screenwriters/stand ups/filmmakers who only understand any form of art through a lens of spite

It's so fucking exhausting to care more about other people's well being than they will ever care for themselves. I just want to go out into the woods and scream, but I'll just create another fucking Appalachian folklore or true crime GRWM video.

would rather have my needs met than 107 different brands of cereal

We live in the ✨ world of tomorrow ✨

My favorite part of the end of Tik Tok is influencers finally going mask off MAGA and followers being shocked. Honey, her foundation was 4 shades too dark and her hometown hair stylist doesn't use toner and you were SHOCKED?!

I can’t do the nicknames. It’s so cringey. I don’t know how people can convince themselves that the richest most powerful people in the world would be hurt in the slightest by being called Elmo or Drumpf. They’re people who can literally murder countries.

the right’s suggestion that fact-checking is inherently liberal is truly the weirdest self-own of all time

The most irritating thing about Hulu is making you watch an ad break before playing the fucking end credits and hitting next episode, then you have to watch ANOTHER FUCKING AD BREAK BEFORE A SHORT COLD OPEN AND THEN IT'S ANOTHER FUCKING AD UYGHJIHHKHGGHHGFFFG

I hope UNLV beats Boise State, not because I'm an alumni, but just to spite that fucking blue field

Me: I want to shuffle all songs from this artist
Spotify: here are all songs FEATURING this artist
Me: no, no, just want the songs BY the artist
Spotify: oh, okay, here's 2 songs and a remix
Me: skip. Please play songs by artist, not remixes
Spotify: oh okay, here's Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter

Exciting night at the mid-size southern city open mic night on thanksgiving week. There are people being carried out by police, but I can't truly make out what's happening because I haven't got new glasses in 3 years.

Love that my life is about to be decided by a book so awful that it's had a book club every Sunday for thousands of years, yet only half of the followers have ever read it from cover to cover.