If you spill your soup, you’ll go blind.

My guesses (about you)
1. Big daddy
2. That time someone called you “big daddy”
3. You’re actually petite and childless

If you’re playing against other good players, your odds are no better than 1:10 at the beginning of the season. And probably no better than 1:4 once the playoffs start. So many things have to go right.
That said, I won a 96-team contract league back-to-back.

YouTube video by Reelblack One Hey Kid, Catch | Mean Joe Greene for Coca-Cola (1979)

And then he tossed you his jersey?

youtu.be/ITDFgsRIryg

Giftmas jammies and a space heater to keep the baby warm.

Romeo is dunzo.

You’re not alone in either of those sentiments. Better days are coming.

*No mackerel were blessed in this photo

The Lions?

I agree with that 100%, but still think that most “average people” have never heard of him.

Tom Waits was never popular, tho

You son of a bitch. I’m baking mine in the morning, letting everything blend together overnight first.

Titty bars, casinos and distilleries. That’s just three of the Deadly Sins without even trying.

I’m a big fan of ass joy.

“that peaked in the 90s” is unnecessary, the sentiment was already perfect.

James Watson, dead at 97, was a scientific legend and a pariah among his peers James Watson, the co-discoverer of the structure of DNA who died Thursday at 97, was a scientific legend and a pariah among his peers.

A Sharon Begley byline, almost 5 years after her death.

Upon hearing the news James Watson had died, a STAT reporter said in our Slack, "I wish I could read what Sharon would have written."

Incredible news: Sharon in fact did pre-write a Watson obit. And it is masterful and excoriating.
🧪🧬🧫

That’s $500 more than a disc golf starter set, no thanks.

Nobody hates Detroit. They’re the single most fun team in the league to root for.

YouTube video by Clutch - Topic Texan Book of the Dead

Always liked Clutch’s version better.

youtu.be/G_cm96e-yIo

Manning Cast is the best thing that ever happened to MNF so I don’t have to listen to those two anymore.

Is his job to annoy the F out of me? Then yes, he’s second best to Buck.

I also hate Ohio State players, but come on. Never missed a game for his first 8 seasons and 29th all time in rushing yards. He was a plodder, yes. But also an effective bruiser.

This is what democracy looks like. #NoKings

“Smug prick” is my normal voice, sorry about that.

Are you referring to the “we all got sprayed with coffee splatter” uniform disaster, or some other uniforms that were more pleasing to the eye?

@ember2remember.bsky.social wait, what?

Imagine throwing a huge masturbatory birthday party that nobody came to. Meanwhile, millions of people across the world threw huge events devoted to how much of a piece of garbage you are.

Oh wait.

YouTube video by carposporophyte Tartlets

youtu.be/5S5o20vh63M

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This shirt is the plot of Beowulf.