Bungholes Johnson PSL Edition

I recently flew and forgot I'd thrown some protein shakes in my carry on. They wanted me to throw them out but I mentioned I was diabetic so those were safe for me to eat on the go. The guy just shrugged and said "Ah okay, yeah, that's fine." And just let me get through security.

They honestly shouldn't even have those buttons if you think about it.

As a Texan, you can skip it. They're cool cities but you gotta be in Texas and there's a non zero chance someone will hit you with a diesel truck. Even if you're just flying over.

If this gets reskeeted 483,000 times I’ll buy a miniature donkey.

Repost if you have more followers than the Official White House BlueSky Account

It was at an orgy.

Don't boob like my brother!

God I'm so sorry you had to grow up in Arlington.

Before Elon even bought Twitter I replied to a post where he said we should vote on if news articles were correct and called him a dumbass. My entire 35 follower account got nukes from orbit.

Yeah I was again out camping and laying in a hammock and in the middle of the night heard a horse whinnying. It kept coming down the trail and then was between me and the person I was camping with. And then passed farther down the trail. We got the hell out of there at first light.

Also heard a ghost horse another time I was backpacking.

I was backpacking one time and I'd set up camp on top of a little ridge. On the other side of the valley I saw what looked like someone carrying a lantern walking up the other side of the valley. As it got to the top it just kept going up into the sky. Kept rocking back and forth as it went up.

Well I never!

I just have an email job but I think that could psych me up to face it.

Oh shit, that's cool as hell

🙏 prayers up 🙏

There are some downsides to living way north of Dallas but I have two HEBs I can get to fairly quickly.

Giant crab shooting lasers out of its eyes with text that says "silence, pedo lover".

Created a thing we can use in fun Internet arguments with Trump supporters.

I know it's probably a reflection of a lamp but it kind of looks like he's seeing the eye of Sauron in the distance.

Well I was thinking about visiting Sunset when I visited but I don't want to drink sweat.

I did this and it was cool except every once in a while the AC system would kick on and all the doors in the place would shake. And the time someone left a CPR dummy out and I almost shit my pants.

I'm sure that's a nightmare to maintain but it is also very cool. If I had the disposable cash this would be my midlife crisis mobile.

God I could make so much money as a Dem consultant.

I do find myself shouting "King of da road!" when I'm driving so maybe the seats off gas some kind of nerve agent.

I'm not sure. I went from a 2001 F250 to a new Ram and they're the same size. It kind of blew my mind. Honestly they're kind of tame compared to the Fords. At least around here the Ford truck drivers are like road barbarians.

I saw your post about it yesterday and the next day it was on my local news half a continent away. We live in amazing times.

As a Ram driver this is correct.

I want to leave this god forsaken state so badly.

Arnie Tex. Guy lives down in the Valley in Texas and makes amazing looking food. His carne asada marinade is fantastic.

As a formerly big guy on his way to being less of a big guy you have inspired me to finally get the giant chest piece I've been wanting. You look cool as hell.