Dr. Glenn Goblins PhD

Thinking of moving to the beautiful outer outer Melbourne suburb of Glen Morpheus. It's a new suburb out west that has 40 metres of footpath, no shops, schools or bus links and all the houses are black cubes clustered on a treeless, concrete floodplain. Also you can't afford to live there.

Not sure if you're aware but ICE thugs are treating your fellow Minnesotans the way you treat your staffers. Going to do anything about it?

You can see freight, V-line and metro trains from my new gym's upper level while you're working out. Expecting a generation of jacked gunzels to develop shortly.

It's a rare opportunity. No doubt you've heard of the sorceress Scalandra the Undying? Well she tragically passed away last month. Of natural causes, be not alarmed. And her apprentice Eldred the Unprepared is keen to sell. There is one tiny complication. Are you familiar with demonic entities?

Hi it's Galador the Honest here from Wizard Realtors. Last time we spoke you were in the market for a 3-storey tower with an antechamber and built-in orb? Well we have a great property that's just come on the market in the Shrouded Marshes - yes I know the area's reputation but listen, it's Elvish.

We have a saying in my village: Don't piss where you shit. We have a saying in my inner-Melbourne suburb: Don't peel betroot in your wedding dress. We have a saying in my decaying empire's former capital: Today's warlord is tomorrow's emperor.

Go to bed, my son. He won't go to bed.

It's so gross that they fuck in it!

Our elderly members are advised to PICK UP THE FUCKING PACE!!!

We've never cancelled a single Hot Soup and a Mid-Afternoon Run No Hats Allowed event and today will be no different. Bring your dog!

Not sure what I clicked on when I downloaded a couple of apps recently but I started getting ads in my dreams telling me to invest my retirement savings in "super hot" unregistered Chinese ETFs. Honestly this stuff seems so much more compelling when you're asleep.

I've not read Zhuangzi but the bits of the Tao Te Ching I've read are incredible

Confucius destroyed

Yes, yes!

That repeated sentence structure is such a tell, but then there's also that frictionless fuzziness to it. There's hardly any meaning to grasp in the words.

After six or seven pints I created the beer that makes you smart. But upon waking hungover I discovered it was all a drunkard's dream and I was left stupider than when I began.

"Ooh ah witcher, fight me like a ma-AAARGH!"

It's my first day as an international lawyer. My laptop doesn't have a charger, there's no desk or office and my boss died six months ago.

I'll try!

Happy new year René!

Prime ministers should not speak even if spoken to

Hopefully this year is... ah too late

👋

Can't quit the other place but the vibe here is much nicer

It's truly ridiculous

Hello my friends

Every podcast I listen to runs ads for dick pills. What do they know that I don't?

Why the world’s eyes are on Team Cherry, a small Adelaide-based game developer Despite attention firmly focused on the Los Angeles' Summer Game Fest this week, many are gazing south for more details on Hollow Knight: Silksong.

The most popular game in the world right now is a sequel to smash hit 2017 title from an Adelaide-based 3-man game studio.

Despite this success, it's barely acknowledged in Australian media? Here's a good newsletter questioning why that's the case.

I am counsellor to the Storage King, he values my wisdom

By god that's a whole new form of posture