andy 🐋🎳

now that the swifties have soured on her latest album it's finally time for taylor to start making music for her true and natural base, 50 or 60 year old men

crunchy gotta b one of the best flavors

'U2 -  Until The End of the World' By Bradley Morgan  (BOOK REVIEW) - Glide Magazine The efficiency of Bradley Morgan's U2 Until The End of the World belies its heft. In the 240 pages of the 11" by 9" hardcover, the author provides a

Thanks to @glidemag.bsky.social for this review of my new U2 book on the eve of its publishing.

“Bradley Morgan certifies his scholarship…those academic touches ratify this title as a ‘coffee table book’ that transcends any pejorative in that descriptive phrase.”

glidemagazine.com/318296/u2-un...

Unfortunately, I lack the maturity to read the results of a Pew Research Center survey without going 'pew, pew, pew' in my head.

Winston from the television show Home Improvement with his face visible

forbidden knowledge

I'm like the hamburglar but for money instead of burgers

do you think it feels good for the fan when the shit hits it?

getting into conspiracy theories so i can achieve my dream of being the first man on the moon

image of a white clay slab with six little white egg shaped creations placed in little holes on the white slab. each egg has a little smile or frown drawn on their face

close up image of the clay eggs and tray. you can see they are very rudimentary and covered in fingerprints still

i made eggs

(using the Voice from dune) I'm just chilling in cedar rapids

“Portland is a warzone” but it’s just Fred Armisen violating the Geneva Conventions

are you wasting your life or are you chillin in cedar rapids

website is lagging quick everyone type stuff like "laaaaaag laggggggg lagg fuck fkin lagg" like we're online gamin

Tim Robinson hysterically saying I almost killed myself Julie!

when someone tries to talk me down after suffering a minor inconvenience

man, fuckin' Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua, bitch

Me: *thinking to myself after someone wrongs me* You made an inconsequential and powerless enemy today my friend

How is it illegal to attack a 15-foot Animatronic Glowing-eyed Pumpkin-headed Skeleton with a sword? Seems like something society should encourage.

classicists asleep, post modern

accusing kids dressed up in stormtrooper costumes of stolen valor

they’re normalizing me tomorrow

Dante's seven factors of authentication

I am basically 3 live grenades in a trenchcoat

Geppetto was the woodcarver. His marionette was Geppetto's monster

Tim Meadows is on Cameo

Me: *pays 140 dollars*

Tim Meadows: get away Dewey! don’t eat that Panda Express Orange Chicken! you don’t want any of that shit! It’s delicious!

Me: *delighted* *pays 140 dollars*

Meadows: Dewey get out of here! Don’t eat the rangoons! You don’t want any of that shit!

Me: *delighted* *pays 140

BISSFUL MOMENTS Multi Waffles Made per Hour 72 WAFFLE / HOUR 3.5*2.1*0.8 inch PYY Color: Silvery

72 waffle/hour

The final episode of The Simpsons should end with the family moving to Quahog, Rhode Island, but along the way they get in an accident with a nuclear waste disposal truck and become the Griffin family. Also they change their names for some reason. It’s airtight.

An app icon of a printer/scanner combo and the app name "brother iPrint&Scan"

So Hulk Hogan, why are you a great candidate for the Administrative Assistant position?

Hulk Hogan:

i'm too jaded and irritable to start all over again on yet another platform so if this place implodes i'll simply join floyd on the balcony and while he growls at passing dogs i'll yell out what would have been random shitposts at their owners

Customers who say River Side Casino doesn’t keep it real will be pleasantly surprised by our “We’re Gonna Bust Craps In Your Ass” promo.

In a world where Poster's Madness exists, you really can't have one person in charge of anything important