Osiris Ani

I will admit that I was hoping that it might've involved riding downhill, headlong, atop a corpse. ...but, y'know, that might be how it started. I'm just going to assume that that's true. ...to escape from wolves. ...and yeti.

Me, last week, discussing Olympic “skeleton” with a friend:

I’m in the second phase of that, literally right now. (The first phase is basically the weird cousin of “revenge bedtime procrastination.”)

[shadowy figure lovingly tip-toeing through the woods]

Already there—right behind you.

A couple of decades ago, I wrote a post soliciting candidates for an arch-nemesis, just to assure that I got a good one.

A friend volunteered, and thus the contract was sealed. It’s mostly a ceremonial role, in which I shake my fist and shout, “NEMESIS!” whenever we happen upon each other.

“…shall not be infringed.”

“Yes,” I said, “for the love of God!” —Monchhichi

Dekkia has done a pretty great job at derailing this conversation, though, all for the sake of pedantry.

No wonder we can’t get anything done.

Granted, from a particular point of view, that also describes the plot of 1984.

The early bird catches the worm. So does the late worm. Honestly, there are really more than enough worms to go around; maybe stop thinking so much about the scarcity of worms.

This is the way.

bsky.app/profile/pwna...

We’ll just have to agree to disagree.

Lactose intolerance? That sounds like a skill issue, bro.

(I personally lack that skill, but thankfully there are pills to accommodate that.)

Sir, you are out of control.

I will die on this hill.

[blushes]

If they really wanted to win, they would’ve put more effort into having been born earlier. Losers.

That’s almost the entire game plan of the far right, except that the list also includes minorities and other historically marginalized people. A certain demographic used to be able to confidently tell themselves, “at least, as far as society is concerned, I’m in a better position than the riffraff.”

It has become completely unironic that a bunch of self-admitted TERFs are perfectly fine with incidentally harming biological women, and simply considering it collateral damage.

…so it’s perfectly aligned with the company’s core principles, is what you’re saying.

Preserved, preferably, but honestly, either way would suffice.

If/when I die, I want my brain put into a robot body, regardless of whether or not the technology exists for my brain to actually control that body or even interact with it in any meaningful way.

I just think it would be cool.

TL;DR — In terms of quality assurance, people who refer to themselves as “alphas” are defective.

I, a grown man, am beyond the point of general-availability. I’ve been patched, repeatedly, get regular feature and security updates, and am generally well-maintained.

…like, only slightly buggy.

By the cusp of adulthood, people should’ve progressed to at least the beta or release candidate versions of themselves.

I’m in IT, so when I see someone describe themselves as an alpha, I interpret that to mean that they’re failure-prone, feature-incomplete, and basically not ready for public consumption.

If you don’t get to be a spooky skeleton, then what is even the point of dying?