ThirdInCharge

Oh no will have to shelve them as my go to on such matters - it’s in my ears now though

a cartoon character says yep no brain cells here in front of a blue sky ALT: a cartoon character says yep no brain cells here in front of a blue sky

Why does going to the garage for an MOT make me lose brain cells?
1. Asked husband to drop me off!!
2. Walked into town to waste some time and just had a meltdown that I don’t have my car keys
3. Now coffee in Costa - time limit in car park is 2 hours, checked my watch

Nope probably just designed to give my best mate a good laugh when we Airbnb and my husband forgets he’s not a hobbit

The only time an overheard train conversation has been vaguely interesting was tab-hanging on the Cathedral City boys talking about why they only have one colour of cheddar #bigcheeses

She’ll have been one of the Mums protesting against Jamie Oliver school dinners and stuffing Maccys in through the school gates to her starving kids

Mothercares finest overalls… also available in red

a close up of a woman 's face with a white shirt on ALT: a close up of a woman 's face with a white shirt on

My kids eyes went perfectly round and their eyebrows hit the ceiling!!!

Who serves Spaghetti Bolognaise with a boiled egg in it and a close, so close its touching, side salad?
“People” - my family have done this very thing

a man wearing sunglasses and headphones is saying not for me mate ALT: a man wearing sunglasses and headphones is saying not for me mate

… but thank you

It is on my list - love Portugal - would love to visit Porto and train to Lisbon

Perfect

Not sure but had to slide my glasses down my nose to read this as I blindly bought 1.5s instead of 2s in a myopic haze last week

Death by moveable feast and low hanging fruit!
Out now a new novel by Crispin (formerly from our New Media dept)

If you get a boat pop by for me, I’ve a flask and no plans

My kids: oh no Mummy, in a minute you’re going to be crying out loud

#repetitionworks

I’m between Bathmat and Windsock, so Potato will fit right in

Jenny! Sit at the back with Sharon!

a group of people are standing in front of a microphone and the words same same are on the screen ALT: a group of people are standing in front of a microphone and the words same same are on the screen

Nathan and Nathaniel used to be in my swimming class (brothers)

Our twins…. Bathmat & Windsock

Or the hedgehogs… one cheese & pineapple and one cocktail sausage & silverskin onion

On cobs too -FFS who’s Mum made this rubbishy buffet

Am sorry that Fabio is poorly… but also we have cat glasses everyone, cat glasses.

a woman in a blue sweater and floral pants is standing in a room . ALT: a woman in a blue sweater and floral pants is standing in a room .

I had to go back to read what you’d actually written

two women are talking in a store and one of them is saying big mistake big huge ALT: two women are talking in a store and one of them is saying big mistake big huge

Ooh I did that once

Mmm I never said it was a bad decision 😋

It’s like KSI promoted tweets and U2 forced music today 🤷🏻‍♀️

a woman wearing a headband and earrings says what do you mean ALT: a woman wearing a headband and earrings says what do you mean

It’s genuinely baffling…

Feeling inspired by your influencing, I just rootled around the biscuit tin and found a stray Chocolate Digestive behind the rubbishy shortbreads