forlorn leghorn

new idea for lonely people on valentine's day: we go outside and howl

9am therapy then going straight to work

at some point my brain stopped referring to him as dr. robby and is instead calling him Doctor Rhombus

i always take the opportunity to piss in a dream. get the peeing done then so you save time on your morning routine

i am going to do Super Size Me, but with Temu Food

sure. why not

as long as there is more than one bathroom at the office, you can take a nap in one of them

matt and jay in NTBTS are willing to go to any lengths to play a show at the Rivoli but draw the line at emailing the booker to schedule. this is why i respect them

getting those teens to rack up debt so they have to go on Beast Games to pay it off

no more ironic detachment. only ironic attachment from now on

whoever was working at Candy Systems and Research and figured out they could pivot nerds rope into nerds gummy clusters is the only true innovator of this millennium

if only bad bunny started his halftime set with We Are Charlie Kirk, he could have started the discourse that would kill posting once and for all

evil loading screen tip: *pacing around* is an easy alternative to *doing anything else*

do not underestimate the power of a cool niche tool you may never use

seems public backlash has adobe backtracking. i still have time to make this mistake!!

.@ punxatawney phil, an ice cream truck just drove by my house, bitch!

i almost registered for a community college class for adobe animate that would have concluded right before the abrupt shutoff date. that would have been very funny and fit in well with every other bad choice i have made in life. maybe i have turned a new leaf...

act of war against Smiling Friends. shameful

forgot to check if there was a celebrity in there

the Fast Five safe heist scene, but it's me in my subaru stealing the Criterion Closet

in director jail for making a movie too good

okay weezer, line up for the blue album cover re-take. i know the camera looks weird. it's vintage!

don't worry, man. i sent like 3 messages this week. i think i can handle it

this vs. 2006 no AI aronofsky lmao. he's washed!

can't wait for a series where every shot has a strict 5 second maximum

honestly i love the campy drama of the doomsday clock. wish i came up with it

why is everyone so mad about that new Dark Souls movie

important appointment early tomorrow morning. so, of course, i just ate some food that i definitely know has given me diarrhea previously