Phil Jeffries

After exhausting all other options, I’ve decided to lose my shit.

This should include alchohol, tobacco, caffeine, gambling, porn and anything else that brings people joy.

This is huge

So, did they monkey have herpes before the crash?

Sorry I winced when you showed me a pic of your new baby.

Smothering your children means something else to the Amish

Word

Simple. Robot babies.

You're not the boss of me

In New Zealand, the red car has the right of way. Regardless of position on the road. We just really like red cars.

My money is on him choking on a bat

Toaster Bath Podcast Society & Culture Podcast · Just two bros hanging out and talking about what ever we feel like. If you have a minute or 60, come listen to us. Watch the video version on youtube: https://www.youtube.c...

This may not be the one then... podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/t...

This is unpossible

As an atheist I can confirm this is true

Would the golden dome protect Canada from missiles fired from the USA?

She's making movies, on location

In my opinion their best album and in my top 5 best albums of all time.

This could be an Onion headline in another timeline...

It reminds me of the Onion Headline "Our long national nightmare of peace and prosperity is finally over"

I suspect his family would participate

You may mock us, but this tank was a very effective weapon. Few enemies are able to focus on the fight when they are doubled up with laughter.

Black cat with a label "CAT" on him.

That time I was trusted with a label maker.

I assume all of blue check twitter will get a copy

Weak and feckless...

This would actually explain a lot.

If America still had any friends they would be staging an intervention right about now...