@sirgoofbag.bsky.social
Bumbling bisexual boi 🏳️🌈 Oddball storyteller 📝 Penitent gamer 🎮 Film school survivor 🎬 Small-time hood 🦹🏻♂️ Proud father of two FBI Special Agents 🐶
Me after watching the Game of Thrones finale
25.10.2025 21:18 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I feel like Ben Gvir personally being in the room when Greta Thunberg was being tortured should be bigger news
15.10.2025 19:44 — 👍 6333 🔁 1937 💬 75 📌 60
10 movies to get to know me 🤓
16.10.2025 01:09 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 1Clown Burgers: NOW WITH 100% AUTHENTIC CLOWN MEAT!!!
15.10.2025 19:01 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I’m what one could generously describe as Paul Giamatti-shaped.
06.08.2025 08:51 — 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Lost my beard, lemme know if anyone finds it plz 🙏
03.08.2025 04:04 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Scully really wanted a sip
31.07.2025 20:45 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0daffy: lithen, bugs, not all of us can be thucking dick all day. some of uth have work to do.
bugs: you wish you were sucking dick as much as i was.
daffy: yeth, i do.
bugs: just admi- wait.
daffy: but that i'm not thucking dick all day still leaveth me with more time to get that bag. grindthet.
Yes son the dog is in heaven & hes a pokemon now. The dog became a pokemon as thats what he desired most within his magic heart when he died
08.04.2025 09:56 — 👍 7742 🔁 882 💬 45 📌 22
Check out my review for the spooky-ass horror novel I Believe in Mister Bones by @fuckmaxbooth.bsky.social! It’s BONE-chilling 💀
www.goodreads.com/review/show/...
Fuckin tulpas, am I right?!
25.03.2025 03:36 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0(seeing FBI agents sprinting in my direction as I'm being stabbed) Oh thank god I'm--(they run past me and tackle a guy who's flipping off a tesla)
19.03.2025 01:41 — 👍 22325 🔁 2651 💬 45 📌 57*rips a bodacious ten-second fart that should have been banned by the Geneva Conventions* M’lady.
12.03.2025 20:37 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Wake up and smell the piss!
12.03.2025 09:03 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Thou art henceforth banished to the Cuck Chair! Begone with thee!
08.03.2025 22:28 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Severance Snape.
07.03.2025 19:37 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Bread Bread Breademption
06.03.2025 03:38 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Me to my wife after she rips some majorly gnarly farts
03.03.2025 23:15 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Saw an acting professor of mine show up in I Think You Should Leave! That’s the sign of a good acting professor!
01.03.2025 19:46 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Marvel Rivals Ultimate Lines:
THE MOOOOON HAUNTS YOUUU
IT’S TIME TO PUT ON A SHOW
PURRREEEE CHAAAOOOOSSSSS
I AAMMMM GROOOOOT
JUDGE, JURY, EXECUTIONEERRRRR
YOUR POWERS ARE MINE
NOW THIS IS REAL FIREPOWER
IT’S MORBIN’ TIME
GAWRSH, I’M GONNA GOOF YOU UP
The world is a Frankenstein.
22.02.2025 03:19 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I bet people with aerophobia are feeling PRETTY smug nowadays!
20.02.2025 10:16 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Just once I want someone to look at me and say “HUMMINA HUMMINA HUMMINA, AWOOOOOGA!” 😔
19.02.2025 04:14 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Maybe I wasn’t clear about this. I wanted more egg and no plane crash, not many plane crash and no egg.
17.02.2025 23:28 — 👍 57606 🔁 7440 💬 574 📌 194I just ate a bunch of Sweet Tart gummies really fast. The gods will punish me for my hubris 😔
17.02.2025 21:43 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Checking out this movie that apparently predicted the danger of using any American airline under the second Trump administration!
17.02.2025 08:04 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0hakeem jeffries' wife packing up to go stay at her parents because she asked him to wash the dishes and he stood in front of the sink throwing his hands in the air and saying "what can i do, the water isn't even on"
14.02.2025 21:10 — 👍 13325 🔁 2038 💬 202 📌 91ACAB includes Dog Man. Sorry, he’s gotta go up against the wall too. Them’s the breaks!
14.02.2025 21:13 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Flibbertigibbet-ass motherfucker
12.02.2025 19:37 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Dang, the pall bearer group chat is really poppin off
11.02.2025 02:53 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
