Joe Papperello

ΤΟΥ STORY The purpose of a toy is to bring happiness to a child ΤΟΥ STORY 2 Toys must accept that their child will someday outgrow them ΤΟΥ STORY 3 Toys can find new purpose with a new child ΤΟΥ STORY 4 Toys can abandon children, create their own purpose, and pursue relationships with other toys ΤΟΥ STORY 5 Toys can learn how to create new toys without the involvement of a child ΤΟΥ STORY 6 Toys construct a secret, self sustaining society parallel to human civilization ΤΟΥ STORY 7 The great human/toy wars begin THOUSANDS OF YEARS LATER Cars 1-3

Fortunately, I already figured out the plots of the next several Toy Story films

November-themed official "Super Monkey Ball 2" (GCN) wallpaper.
[スーパーモンキーボール2]

That restaurant you see on your delivery app might not actually exist. That delivery app you see on your phone might not exist. Your hunger might be an illusion. You might not actually exist. A glow appears on the horizon. Birdsong tickles through the swaying tree canopy.

Brewers outfielder Sal Frelick making an intense face as he prepares to throw the ball

this is the most like a mike tyson's punch out guy i have ever seen anyone look

i made a helpful reference

a paper sign taped to a drive-thru speaker that says: sensor is broken ☹️ just say: “it’s burger time” we’ll be happy to take your order

it’s burger time

I have a two-step solution to our modern loneliness epidemic:
1. Haul immense stone slabs over long distances to build a Great Temple to Aten;
2. Gather at the Great Temple to Aten.

WIFE: The new neighbors were kind enough to invite us to dinner. Please try to be normal.

ME: of course.

[later]

ME (using a fork to put a layer of butter between two potato chips): You know, buildings are really insects — their skeletons are on the outside to protect the teeming life within

love to see it. want to revive your old Pebble? grab the beta of our new app!

See what's working so far: ndocs.repebble.com/changelog

Pls report bugs - button in app!

iOS testflight.apple.com/join/T17YYZYq
Android play.google.com/apps/testing...

BBC News headline: Frankenstein is monster success at Venice film festival

Actually, Frankenstein is a doctor success at the Venice film festival

Q. Have you seen any good movies lately? A. Well, I've only seen one in the last couple of years. It's called Norbit by Eddie Murphy. Q. How did you like it? A. Fantastic movie. Very funny. Q. What's your favorite movie? A. Norbit.

RIP to Brian Wilson, who gave us many perfect albums but also the perfect interview

full house sequel show "fullest house" where the house is full of secret rooms and maze like passageways with a ton of heretofore unseen uncles and there are also "false uncles" and secret rare uncles only spoken of in whisper and a colony of golden labs and just loose beach boys roaming around

The Worst Person You Know Just Made A Great Point guy

The Worst Person You Know Just Made A Great Point again

today

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you don’t know about. Attack them. Now they’re fighting two battles

HONK

screenshot from DoorDash app. Reads: Step 4: Whipped Cream Optional [check box] No Cream [check box] Yea Cream On It

yea cream on it

You know, your own imagination is far more wonderful Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood

Than any computer could ever be. You know why? Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood

You’re a living human being. And a computer is just a machine. Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood

Human beings are far more wonderful than machines. Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood

Mister Rogers never misses

screengrab of a facebook short with overlay 'youve been using ketchup wrong!'

well i'll be damned

discovered that Little Caesar’s has an Apple Watch app and it’s just this image that you can’t interact with in any way

Costco and Trader Joes are yin and yang. Together they form a harmonious balance. One sells big piles of normal food, the other sells small piles of weird food. These are the two food piles people need

live rat in uber eats order bag is a new one

I was excited to tell my kids that there's a sequel to Encanto, only to scroll down and learn that Google's AI just completely made this up

logging on

⚠️ JUST CHECKING IN TO MAKE SURE WE'VE ALL LISTENED TO THE KIM DEAL RECORD ⚠️

Please try a third thing, Scientists.

Not now, phone case packaging

"It's funny when you think about it, because if Trump wins, Peanut's owner won't be able to make money on Only Fans because Project 2025 will ban porn."

:the attendant swabbing my burning forehead with a cloth in 8th century Byzantium: "She has been delirious and babbling all night my lord."

Opinion | It has fallen to me, the humor columnist, to endorse Harris for president Isn’t this what a newspaper is supposed to do?

This is excellent, and should lead their paper tomorrow.