Jason Behenna

My favorite person in the world is in China on a 12 hour time difference, so I barely get to talk to her and I don’t fucking like it.

She has about 30 emails of cat photos and backlogged thoughts from my brain that she has to deal with every morning as I am going to bed.

Man…TWICE they didn’t give a shit about Ernie Hudson.

He’s literally a ghostbuster in the movie. It’s the title of the movie.

*when the recipe only calls for 2 cloves of garlic*

Me:

If you’re not hearing this in her voice, shame on you.

Side note: Beth Grant is typecast into roles like this, but she nails them.

*people protesting bad bunny*

Listen, I enjoy Mexico like everyone else. I have my fiestaware, I’m even known to put some iceberg lettuce on my Tacos (pronounced Tak-ohs)

I just don’t know why he has to sing all his songs in Mexican. I also don’t care for gyrations. That’s for the bedroom.

“Some of the jokes made me laugh” reads like ‘I went into this comic book expecting War and Peace, but then I realized this person is a joker. A real goofball. After a lot of soul searching, I realized, I too can be a goofball.

5 stars

Did you know, and this is true, if you take unpopped popcorn kernels and plant them in your garden, exactly 1 year from when you planted them, you will have unpopped popcorn kernels in your garden.

Data validation is key to all of our daily lives. There are so many scammers, spam, robocalls anymore that even if it was verified that the president of the United States was calling me personally, I would decline it because I don’t respond to scam likely calls.

I’m also aware that Ghouls in the bathroom are Ghoulies, so don’t come at me with that shit.

Also, the percussion rhythm is replaced with ghouls playing ribs like a xylophone

A Halloween version of Beastie Boys “girls” called “ghouls”

The lyrics can basically stay the same but replace she/her with them/they (ghouls have no gender) & replace the sexiest shit

“Ghouls, they really scare me
Ghouls, to scare up my room
Ghouls, haunt the laundry
Ghouls, and in the bathroom”

Homeless encampments, people begging at stop lights, etc are really annoying and we need to fucking get rid of them.

I propose taxing the rich even slightly and putting in programs that help people instead of destroying their shit and expecting them to…just disappear or magically have money?

Candy cane Malort is what I will be presented with as a welcome drink (with no description) when I think I’m in heaven but I’m actually in hell.

If your question is “deport where? He was born here!”

Yep. Exactly

Deport stephen miller

There are ten things I do daily that keep me healthy.

1. Pet cat

2. Pet another cat

3. Start a spreadsheet that lets me catalogue and plan against my “enemies”

4. Ice cream cat. Who doesn’t love ice cream, but cat adjacent!

5. Realize just loving cats isn’t enough.

6. Eat a light snack

“Waiting room” -fugazi

The only AI actor I care about is Haley Joel Osment in sixth sense.

Technology was crazy back then. He looked so real!

There are three types of JK we need to watch out for:

1. Jk (rowling) - terf

2. Jk (abbreviation) - just kidding

3. Jk (Simmons) - fantastic character actor and main actor

Don’t do anything shitty, Simmons

Timeline cleanser

Under my direction, the hero’s of My Lai didn’t massacre unarmed civilians including children, they showed unwavering bravery to zero opposition and will all get the medal of valor.

Just in case you’re ever driving through. Not sure where you family lives nowadays

Look out for blacked out Jeep Cherokees. Newest unmarked state troopers

Bullshit statements in commercials that I love (not in a fun way, but in a “ads, people are stupid and words only matter to lawyers”

1. “Up to 100%” This replaces the “99% effective”

2. “Don’t take if allergic to …” You can never know that until you take it.

People with small kids: it would be very funny to post videos of them successfully saying the word acetaminophen.

Then you can tell them not only can they be president when they grow up, but they’re currently more qualified than the actual president

*diverting this from my actual mental state*

…and that’s how people are trying to use AI.

You need to control AI, not let it control you.

The 3rd thought is often the finale.

I sleep like shit because my brain is processing my other thoughts and dreams and trying to compile them into a story that will make sense, but doesn’t have all of the data

If I could have a true closed circuit system that recorded my thoughts in real time, I would take it.

I just need transcripts.

My brain works in a way that while actively writing notes on my thoughts, my fingers are about 1/3 the speed of my brain so while I flesh out the 1st thought, 3rd fades

If I say hitler shit, I expect hitler results.

It’s standard Newton’s 3rd law shit.

...with LAZINESS