totallylosingmymime

The announcers keep saying that both teams are almost out of pitchers, but they’re forgetting that pitchers and catchers report soon.

I'm not emotionally attached to the White House as a structure or piece of architecture but I definitely don't care for what is for all intents and purposes Donald Trump scooting his itchy dog asshole all over the most recognizable national symbols

The winner of this game will travel to Toronto to play Vladimir Guerrero III and the Blue Jays.

I think this is the truest baseball tweet for me

If you ban Calvin and Hobbes you’re a straight up fascist son of a bitch and that’s that

We need to build some real social stigma around being afraid of cities. You don't have to like them or live there, but a politics built this strongly around watching TV and going "ewww" is embarrassing, and people should be embarrassed by it. It's like "fear of werewolves" being your top issue.

The line in Bush v. Gore that’s like “uhhh our holding applies to uhhh this election only,” but for the sake of the current conservative justices’ investment portfolios

This is how you get Mr. Hydes, do you want that

Classic scientist, drinking from containers without looking

Colors are hard

They’re not “getting their money’s worth” because it’s not a business venture you dog killing piece of shit

A Chicago Pope implies the existence of an MLA Pope and APA Pope

@niemat.bsky.social

Elon wearing a cheese hat

lmao eat shit loser

opening week for baseball and zero day games, we really are in hell

@niemat.bsky.social

without section 230, you could have a world where bluesky is liable for me calling this man a clueless, tech illiterate, fascist enabling motherfucker

Werner Herzog: the cruel milkshake thinks himself a master, but he is, in truth, a slave to the machinations of the fry man, who defies gravity through sheer force of will. the meatball is likewise a fool, but his heart is pure

gritty has seized control of the federal government

Sorry if it's cringe or virtue signaling or whatever but unqualified and unconditional love and support to every trans person on earth. You will win and I will help you.

you're panicking about the news, i'm in the lab brewing up whole new kinds of perceived slights and discourses. did you know it's actually rude to not own a blu ray player so your criterion friends can loan you blu rays? well i'm a maladjusted shut in here to tell you it is

Lesson for this Trump tariff shakedown bullshit is that you can call him up and say "well okay, we'll do [list of things we're already doing], that's a really good idea" and he will take that as a win. It's like putting a blanket over a budgie's cage

Jimmy Carter was the only president who understood that leading a country as evil as America was something you had to spend the rest of your life atoning for.

The Grinch gunned down on the streets of Whoville. Inscribed on the shell casings: stink, stank, stunk

Moe Szy-zanne, though it breaks the Moevember style

Minnesota Just Became The Latest State to Eliminate Prison Gerrymandering A new law will end the practice of counting incarcerated people where prisons are located, which skews political power within the state.

Did you know? Earlier this year, Minnesota became the latest state to eliminate prison gerrymandering.

A new law, signed by Tim Walz in the spring, will end the practice of counting incarcerated people where prisons are located, which skews political power within the state.