jackson henry

Naked
In
My
Back
Yard

from his public exploitation of young girls in pageants, to his lustful comments about women -including his own daughters- to “grab them by the pussy”… there was simply no way of seeing this before he became president

politicians now hedging to garner unhoused votes as demographics swing and the middle class all move into boxes situated in rainy alleyways

the “face-eating leopards that have been starved and beaten in cages” party

ostracized by his oompa loompa brethren, patel now interlopes in the human realm

*radicalized, betrayed, encouraged to commit violence by maga*

Damn democrats!

maga: We don’t like it when another country’s culture comes to ours!

Venezuela, Greenland, Canada, Europe: Yeah dude I know what ya mean.

my mom is a maga nurse

I want to live and play in the fantasy wonderland where those two circles meet, and there are no rules

I swear to god there’d better not be people dancing in here *opens fridge* jesus fucking christ

someone needs to start tracking their spending in starving children

“40 children starved to death for this photo op of Kash drinking beer”

you get stuffed dinosaurs in exchange for hundreds of tickets

this was the promised America that is slipping away from us

congratulations to donald trump for single-handedly defeating canada in sports

he will also demand his own, more-medally medal

maybe but I don’t think it was elon’s plan

I think he actually thinks he’s a badass

“invited me in” aka I pick-me’d my way into the sweaty big boy’s room

it should never be overstated how fucking dumb elon musk is, to take one of the world’s strongest brands, and replace it with a symbol we use to mean anything

sometimes I wake up in the night screaming “OH MY GOD HE’S SO DUMB” and then my cats have to console me

when the dude puts the medal around his neck, you can see his lil heart grow three sizes

bro didn’t do shit but betray America. what a fucking loser.

america in the FO stage of fascism

again

“STOP THINKING ABOUT BIG BONERS GOING IN AND OUT OF MY BUTT.”
-waking up, screaming, in a cold sweat next to your real-doll

keep your medals locked up

like for real

“The middle class is a bunch of freeloading losers.”
-guy who thinks fellating sponsors is work

congrats on giving fresh nationalistic talking points to xenophobes

thanks, sports

guessing their suckers feel like fingers to them so we’re talking a WHILE before maternal repercussions

we need need to make sure the jails are humane for *checks notes* the guards

the betrayal of humanity that maga represents is incalculable

feeding us to viruses, pollution, poverty, sex pests, predatory lenders, etc

generations crippled in perpetuity, for cash

invasive space aliens would likely provide better human healthcare than human fascists

“I want to save this dress but it’s 90% turds” ok

how many of these dudes have fully phoned out all public relations to AI so they don’t have to think about the fascism they’re doing

white guy nachos colby jack melted onto chiiiiiiiiiiiipsssss