Martin Locock

My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
my Works are locked for editing by another user (ye Mighty), notify me when it is available

"The name's Slop, AI Slop"

Arnold watching a TV advert for shoes. Confused, he says "What you talkin' 'bout, Freeman Hardy Willis?"

"I PITY THE FOOL who measures out his life in coffee spoons. I ain't gonna wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled, fool."

Oh look. It's Mr T's Eliot.

They asked me if I had any specific criticisms of the Ghost Train. I said nothing leapt out at me.

S2E1 Kingsley Amis intro and biography

New episode of the Amis Papers podcast - introduction to Kingsley Amis's life and work open.spotify.com/episode/0Eud...

Reform are into Day Three of Racismsplaining. It's harder than it looks.
thecritic.co.uk/easy...

I went to see an artist's 'work in progress' show.
Well, I say work ...,
I say progress ...,
I say show...
I say artist.

Screenshot from a book: “A language like English lives through loanwords, little though its speakers may realize it, and every other language should be accorded the same privilege without facing questions about purity and authen-ticity. Though its "own" lexicon is arguably tiny, English carries many spoils in its imperial sweep, always folding in the greatest hits of other languages, just as a universal museum buys, borrows, or loots from all over. Words like alcohol, alchemy, and algorithm bear the Arabic definite article al-, still distantly reflecting a whole world of medieval learning (and there are many more such words, due to the Moorish conquest, in Spanish). Meander was once a river in Turkey; paradise a walled Persian garden; tragedy some kind of goat song in ancient Athens.”

Ross Perlin’s “Language City” is a great book, but is it overly picky to point out that none of these words entered English because of colonialism? Goodness knows there’s other words he could have found that have done…

(And a lot of the French vocab is because they colonised the English).

It's a shame that so much time and effort goes into grant applications rather than actual research.

The government is promising 2 weeks of work experience for every schoolchild. Has anyone ever actually benefitted from their work experience? and where do they expect all these placements to come from?

The Amis Papers podcast has reached the end of Amis's fiction, but the latest episode shows it's not over yet.

I don't know why people are surprised at comedians taking the Riyadh cash, given the selling out they're all willing to do for a little ad revenue for their podcasts.

"want to see marilyn monroe in gane of thrones?" no? no, i do not. but then again, i'm not an unimaginative little baby who confuses swapping pretty blonde women for "having ideas"

I still haven't gotten over Carly Simon writing that song about me.

Cartoon of a social gathering. A man is talking to a vampire. The man says "Welcome, Count Dracula. Would you like a small aperitif?". The vampire replies "No, I think mine are just the right size".

www.worldofmoose.com/products/ape...

Freddy: The real treasure is all of the friends we killed along the way.

Jason: That's beautiful.

Leatherface: And the faces we wore.

Michael Meyers: *nods, single tear rolls down mask*

This meeting could have been an email but you playin'

One of the conspirators who helped Gavrilo Princip shoot Archduke Franz Ferdinand survived to see the breakup of Yugoslavia. He could conceivably have watched the Neighbours episode where Scott and Charlene got married

"which is nice."

Comedy = tragedy + time

Scarborough Fair = parsley, sage, rosemary + thyme

I can't get enough of historical tragedies about obsessive jealousy- they're so Moorish.

Ocado proudly advertises its order accuracy as 99%, so that's something wrong every time, isn't it?

With a little love, the call could be coming from inside the home.

Easy to turn off just odd they turned it on by default. Well, not odd, bad.

GIRLFRIEND: Um...I don't know. I think this relationship is going too fast.

ME: *sitting on my racecar bed* Lol Sharon, it doesn't actually move.

"And this is the self destruct button"
"Why did you add that?"
"Gotta have one, stands to reason"

A lovely review article (and my first dissertation citation🍾) on Scottish archaeological mollusc exploitation from @jenniferbones.bsky.social & @mlaw.bsky.social. Makes the point that culture ("taste" if you like) may be just as important as economic considerations www.mdpi.com/2571-550X/8/...

My Martin Amis on X: "A spot of cross-pollination here as Martin Locock (@mlocock) Amis fan and fellow podcast creator, offers his two cents on Yellow Dog, an underdog novel in the Amis corpus that he argues brings more pleasure than its critics would have you believe. Here are the 3 reasons why 👇 https://t.co/600rn7BUbX" / X A spot of cross-pollination here as Martin Locock (@mlocock) Amis fan and fellow podcast creator, offers his two cents on Yellow Dog, an underdog novel in the Amis corpus that he argues brings more pleasure than its critics would have you believe. Here are the 3 reasons why 👇 https://t.co/600rn7BUbX

After a discussion with @mymartinamis.bsky.social @jackaldane.bsky.social I have put together a partial defence of Amis's Yellow Dog. It's not as bad as you thought, honest! x.com/i/status/195...

"I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING STRANGERS ON THIS MOTHERFUCKING TRAIN"