Moldy Pumpkins

Dude same, they really could've had breakfast but chose not to

Mine is probably Castaway

I don't think Wyoming should exist as a state. There's not enough people there. We should give it to Colorado

It's just "hard", where giving every user account a small internal table of hyperlinks is trivial.

I shouldn't call the people who work hard here goobers but then... I CANT EDIT IT, CAN I??

#editButton. Also a drafts folder would be nice, with autosave. Hate when bsky scraps my post on app-switch

Always willing to lend a hand for free breakfast 🫡

Maybe you should only listen to audiobooks when you feel sexually satisfied. Just imagine your reader is trying really hard to impress you with their intellect, because the sex was middling at best and they know it and feel ashamed.

I wanted to know what you were referring to, did not disappoint 👌

Post a book you love from the 70s

This book is a heartbreaker. As a military brat, I could relate to some of it, but it's a lot harder than my childhood ever was. But I can empathize a little with the strain and clash of beliefs between father and son.

I can nazi what you're implying here

Yes, but is it the kind of place to raise your kids?

Very chill, it trusts you

The phrase 'every corpse that's come my way' has gotta be the best euphemism I've heard 😂

Look at me down here, all helpless

Waiting until 5 o'clock to snort adrenochrome. I didn't work today, I just want to wait until the appropriate time of day to do drugs so people don't think less of me.

I'm just gonna move forward assuming that everyone you DIDN'T mention after that rhetorical question IS in the Epstein files...

Ooh, you put up glow-in-the-dark NINJA stars...
🤩

Behind every great man is a great woman. Behind every great woman is that same man back to back. Around them is a pack of wolves. The woman grips a knife, the first wolf attacks

[the movie Seven but everyone is chickens]

What’s in the bocks?!

Every day can be the worst day of your life, at least until the next day

That's why I always set my passwords to my deepest darkest secrets. I just know I'm gonna fold under duress

We don't believe in filler, baby

No one pegs your dad better 👉👌

Living a life of loud desperation invites Christ, and for some of us that's just a little too much unwanted attention

If you're ever pee-shy around someone you hate, just imagine their face is in the toilet and you're peeing on it.

Astrovan by Mt. Joy on Apple Music Song · 2016 · Duration 3:06

music.apple.com/us/album/ast...

PROCTOLOGIST: we need to do some follow up scans

ME: but doctor-

PROCTOLOGIST: please stop calling me that

me, redundantly reposting this post

I've very much had enough of the redundant outrage.

It's hard breaking into the shitposting game, but the zero pay and fleeting validation make it worth it

[after watching toy story]

general population as a whole: what a heartwarming story.

me: oh fuck what if there’s a snake in MY boot.