ANAIS NINJA

Hell is a bunch of half-drunk, dead-eyed, South Boston blondes on the hunt for "spicy margs."

@nappydolemite.bsky.social

I’m on TikTok as Michikococonuts and the same on Twitter which I know you’d rather deep throat a curling iron then be back on, but I can talk there and on TikTok if you’re willing

@nappydolemite.bsky.socia shit there is no dm is there?

Well thanks. I appreciate it. I see that you’re going through some stuff and I’d really like to dm if you’re willing,

You’re so funny and we had a great time and I’m looking to connect again. Hope you go for it.

Thank you. Are you on TikTok? Wil you talk to me via dm please?

Trying to apologize for my psychosis and open the connection so I can apologize properly. I’m not tryna be a pest. I care about you

Come find me at TikTok @michikococonuts please. Let’s bury this absurd hatchet

Near
Far
Wherever you are
(Please stay there)

I mean I'm sorry. Many dogs are cute and stuff. I just don't wanna put my head your pillow and have to wonder if I smell dog asshole or be kissing you and getting whiffs of puppy chow.

This is about me

I was nuts and I’m sorry.

Shout out to Walton Goggins for officially kicking off "Middle-aged, receding hairline, scumbag summer."

We salute you, Sir.

Me: "I'm more of a cat person. A cat gentleman, if you will."

Her: "Oh, like a cat lady. That's cute."

Me, licking my butthole in a patch of sun: "Yes."

Okay so what I've come to understand about online dating is that you need to date someone with a dog who is unattractive and lives very far away or you'll die alone

I wish we could be friends after all the bullshit I think there’s still a way. I’m sorry and that’s all.

Me: I think my favorite deadly sin is gluteny

Them: you mean gluttony

Me (going in raw on a warm baguette): I sure as fuck don't

@nappydolemite.bsky.socia

Not effective but not less effective than mine

Hate to admit it but every time a lady has done an impression of me during an argument where she lowers her voice and moves her fists up and down like a baby giant, they absolutely got my ass.

every grocery store becomes an escape room if you see someone you know

My toxic trait? Turning those who want me sexually into people weirded out by my personality.

THERAPIST: Instead of changing from a truck into a robot, what you need to do is to start working on changing what's inside.

OPTIMUS PRIME: *starts crying*

every time i see a jeep i think about how they are less aerodynamic than a cow but every time i see a cow i do not think about a jeep

You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you get thrown out of a pet store

If at first you don't succeed, get used to it. This is your life now.

I remember this one And it’s one of my faves. So glad to see you here.

If you put a lasagna on top of another lasagna, it’s no longer two lasagnas. It’s one giant lasagna. THAT is the power of lasagna.

Oh hi! Adorable.