yeah no for sure

oh yeah, the october CPI is what all federal agencies are required to use every year when adjusting their civil penalty amounts for inflation. so no october CPI presumably means that civil penalty amounts across the government will not increase in 2026

every email is like

[ONE OF THE WEALTHIEST AND MOST INFLUENTIAL PEOPLE ON THE PLANET]:
d trump rise now lghting shadows. ?s now com b4? see you soon again my dear friend

[JEFFREY EPSTEIN]: send happy girl pic

folks, he's just a little guy, is what i'm saying

greg bovino tried to raid the altitude trampoline park in west town but he didn't meet the height restriction

it's actually the "midweight blitz" because greg bovino, in full tactical gear, is under 160 pounds

operation "midway blitz" is winding down. i stuffed greg bovino into the front basket of a divvy and he can't get out

masked goons dragging me out of my house on a saturday afternoon and forcing me at gunpoint to shop at the michigan avenue zara

A photo of wintry Navy Pier

our beloved Miracle Mile Shopping Center. empty. each of these gondolas used to be a small business. all empty.

The James Bond gun barrel with text that says "James Bond survived after getting blown up"

fixed

@WesternRevivalTrad: On this date in 1802 in Vienna, Ludwig von Beethoven performed in public for the first time his Piano Sonata No. 14, which after his death would be renamed the Moonlight Sonata and celebrated as the greatest musical composition ever written

@elonmusk: Great Sonata.

only when i want a New York Slice

this thanksgiving instead of buying food or traveling to see your family you can look at the president's pinterest and comment on his choice of statuary marble

i was just telling someone the other day how you don't really see the vengabus out much anymore

jasmine with an absolute 2000 shaq performance this season, unstoppable force

An email alerting me that $4.01 was deposited into my account due to a class action settlement involving Facebook

Krusty the Clown lighting a cigarette with a $100 bill

no lil debbie christmas trees at the jewels. welcome to donald trump's america

i mean maybe it's jeff foxworthy

if donald trump had any juice he would have attended the tariff oral argument and spent the whole time standing at counsel's table, scowling at roberts like carlos beltran at the 2006 NLCS. the dude is cooked

ahhhhhhhhh look at all the lonely sex pests

3 rows with each NYC mayoral candidate: (blue bar) Zohran Mamdani (yellow bar) Andrew M. Cuomo (red bar) Curtis Sliwa (wearing a red had)

sorry but mamdani and cuomo should have worn blue and yellow hats, respectively

between cuomo and portnoy, mamdani is poised to kill new york's thriving Allegations Industry

let me save you some time: the two pieces are assad and ben brown

lmao

[entire country is the size of nebraska] wow look at america's SPRAWL

andy griffith, the villain from SPY HARD

gonna continue reporting the ICE ads on linkedin as "dangerous or extremist organization" until they mercifully kick me off the platform