we need a derogatory word for the post-dave and busters vaguely douchey restaurant concept built around a themed activity like mini golf, bowling, ping pong, etcetera and QR code ordering. like they're fine, i enjoy going to them, but we still need a derogatory word for them
13.04.2025 00:05 — 👍 690 🔁 18 💬 71 📌 1
everyone loves naming their children after herbs its all basil rosemary sage etc but then the time comes to name a kid nutmeg and all you see is cowardice
17.03.2025 19:04 — 👍 675 🔁 46 💬 83 📌 9
🚨IMPORTANT🚨
👇👇
17.03.2025 00:37 — 👍 1007 🔁 189 💬 51 📌 55
Reminds me of this evergreen tweet:
05.03.2025 05:58 — 👍 24 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
I love leaving voice mails for my senators where I say things like "the USPS is very important to our country" as if I'm helping a small child with a book report or describing our civilization to an alien
25.02.2025 18:43 — 👍 9839 🔁 1554 💬 6 📌 40
grimace probably has a crazy penis under all that purple
22.02.2025 03:54 — 👍 59 🔁 1 💬 5 📌 0
sure, groceries are getting too expensive and planes are dropping out of the sky every day, but have you considered you now have the Opportunity to invest in DookyCoin, the legal crypto that let’s me steal from you?
18.02.2025 18:28 — 👍 6299 🔁 780 💬 67 📌 12
Host of The Athletic Football Show. Formerly of Grantland and The Ringer.
NFL writer | Most recently: The 33rd Team | FO/FTN Almanac | danpizzuta@gmail.com | snapsandstats.ghost.io
Stealer of lighters
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Chicago if it matters. Dive bar comedy vet. Only seem calm because I’m exhausted. Thinking about some new shirts
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I came here to do two things: pray and quote Natalie Imbruglia, and I’m all out of faith.
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Humorisht
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Still in that awkward pre-ghost phase
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it’s too late I’ve ruined it
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